Comments on Random Thoughts: Touchy - Feely Issues.

It's a combination of all these reasons: 1. Sexu...

2007-08-16T01:23:00.000-04:00

It's a combination of all these reasons:

1. Sexual repression: Those who have lived in close proximity to women and have healthy relationships with some woman will be less prone to indulge in such behavior.

2. The fact that you can get away with this. I remember Calcutta being a much safer city for the women some years back. Probably because you could get thrashed by the crowd who were not the apathetic kind.

3. Not all women are encouraged to confront these behaviors (only recommend this in less riskier circumstances). I have seem many such men slink away sheepishly when confronted by some women in buses and trains.

@Sameera - Sad. That most women are exposed to thi...

2007-08-15T23:28:00.000-04:00

@Sameera - Sad. That most women are exposed to this. Glad you liked the adoption articles.

@Neuralnonsense - Yeah. But I have also seen people who have been exposed to the opposite sex indulge in it. Sadly, it seems an acceptable thing to do

@Twisted DNA - I agree. The main culprit is how we see women. What saddens me is that this is not a situation that is changing.

@Gaurav - I have been to Delhi, so I know what you mean sadly :(

@thisisme - Yeah, women shut up and somehow accept it. Makes the situation worse. We have to empower the women!

well..i m glad someone did talk abt this...I have ...

2007-08-15T06:54:00.000-04:00

well..i m glad someone did talk abt this...
I have lived many yrs in uk..n m now back to delhi..n must say..inspite of all the progressiveness n bla blah..india remains the same..its absolytely shameful!
remedy..i for one..do blv women shud learn to confront this..at least stop the guy from continuing with it..i have seen many women suffer silently..which is disgusting
n ppl told me mumbai was way safer..when i travelled..i had even much worse exprnc than that of delhi :( ...
i suspect the basic cause behind this ..is ...lack of respect for women...n thinking of them as pure sex objects..indian men love basking in this thot..maybe the so-called modern educated one may not accpet this....but from what i c..they r no different :( !

You got it right. Indians are a sexually repressed...

2007-08-15T04:36:00.000-04:00

You got it right. Indians are a sexually repressed people. Such wanton acts happen only in countries where sex is a 'bad' word and any discussion on the same is met with disapproval. But what i feel lost on is when 50 somethings are involved in this. I mean 20 somethings in India many of which have never held a girl's hand may indulge in this sort of behavior. But surely for a 30-40 yr old (who presumably gets plenty) this is inexplicable...
And if you thought Mumbai was bad wait till you get to Delhi. Its absolutely shameful out there.

It may be partly because of the not having enough ...

2007-08-15T04:05:00.000-04:00

It may be partly because of the not having enough exposure to opposite sex. Men might be doing such things to satisfy their curiosity or ego that they otherwise have no way of satisfying.

But I would blame the culture in general. Woman is treated lesser to man. This thought is ingrained in our brains since childhood by parents, friends, uncles, movies, movie-posters and songs. With such environment how can we expect average man to respect a woman. This groping is partly because of lack of respect.

I am saying this because when I was at college this is the fundamental difference I found between myself and my other friends who perpetrated such deeds. For example, I would never refer to a classmate as "that bitch" and there are some people who do. And I saw a distinct correlation between people who do and people who take pleasure in teasing women. Just a personal observation.

I think it happens in India because of the lack of...

2007-08-15T02:36:00.000-04:00

I think it happens in India because of the lack of healthy interaction between the sexes. How many Indian males are comfortable approaching a woman ? Its the lack of release that manifests itself in this manner !
Here its different and there is also the fact that you will not get away with it !

BTW nice post on adoption. Also Dr.Mello's talk wa...

2007-08-14T20:42:00.000-04:00

BTW nice post on adoption. Also Dr.Mello's talk was excellent.

"I don't know how bad or good living else where in...

2007-08-14T20:41:00.000-04:00

"I don't know how bad or good living else where in India is"....atleast in Hyd I can say its pretty much the same. I guess it depends on the oppurtunity...small towns are not as crowded as hyd or mumbai...

@Anon- Well, I hope that the attitude changes. I a...

2007-08-14T18:46:00.000-04:00

@Anon- Well, I hope that the attitude changes. I am not holding my breath - but I hope it does.

@Ashutosh - I think having a legal system that works helps a lot. Would also have to do with the attitude of the society, where such behavior is held in utter contempt. In India while "good men" dont grope, no one complains either.

@Anurag - Sorry, I was not thinking abt the Indy day at all. It was just something I felt while coming to school.

@Bongo- Yeah, I know that this is not going to change, at least not with simple protest and such. We need laws and more female empowerment (as was pointed out by the LOB)but still as a woman, I hope that one day I can travel in India in public transport with the same ease I did today.

IMO its the fact that perpetrators in India believ...

2007-08-14T17:44:00.000-04:00

IMO its the fact that perpetrators in India believe that they can get away with it. Women in buses/trains won't protest (no fault of theirs - its likely they'll get blamed for it through some twisted logic) and that provides 'courage' to the scums.

Unfortunately, I doubt any short-term solutions will work - we need a very basic change in attitude in the society.
Sorry about the pessimism :(

Well, in fact I have to say I do think that is the...

2007-08-14T17:26:00.000-04:00

Well, in fact I have to say I do think that is the case. That, and the much better law and order system here, which won't let the guy off easily.

Do you think that it did not happen in the US main...

2007-08-14T17:25:00.000-04:00

Do you think that it did not happen in the US mainly because the "sueing culture" is so pervasive here, that men are put off?

On the eve of 15th August I was trying to remember...

2007-08-14T14:28:00.000-04:00

On the eve of 15th August I was trying to remember things that made me proud of being Indian, and then read your post :(

blame it on orthodox society in gen in India, woma...

2007-08-14T13:40:00.000-04:00

blame it on orthodox society in gen in India, woman is an object to an average person, whom he was forbidden to interact, separate sitting arrangement for girls even in co-ed schools(believe me it was there in my school), couple this with an average person from lower strata of society seeing city life first time by the eyes of Bollywood ; high crime rate , large population , bad policing makes eve teasing a relatively safe crime to commit, and last but not the least, general ignorance and "It doesnt concern me so I dont care" attitude of a general city dweller.