Random Thoughts

2007-08-22T15:24:00.000-04:00

Random Thoughts has moved to a new location.

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HERE.

Moved.. Virtually too

2007-08-22T00:19:00.000-04:00

If left to us, we would have lingered and loitered over on this blogger blog. But then, immensely knowledgeable person, told us to get off our lazy ass and move to a self hosted domain.

Of course, he was the one who was then put to work. Since what I know about coding, computers and all that shit can be written on a grain of rice and still have space left over. He offered to help us out (I think he meant I will answer a question or two and I thought he would be willing to do the whole thing for us :))

So, here’s the new space. Appropriately a beach. Since that is where we abide too. And that is where we love to be. Now get a beer (or nimbu paani, if you prefer) and chill out there..

So skedaddle there and please let us know what you think, we will appreciate your thoughts.

And please give a shout out to the Lord, who was pestered the whole day with every little thing till this was up and running.

First post on that domain is for you, R!

And Pliss to be updating the address.

I will add a code to automatically redirect you folks but an updated url would be appreciated.

Signs Of Old Age

2007-08-21T10:57:00.001-04:00

You know you are growing old when,

- thinking of using massage oils to spice up your love life, makes you think of the mess it is going to make on the bed. "But honey, oil stains are hard to remove! Can we at least change to old sheets on the bed"

- thinking of feeding loverboy in bed, makes you think of the crumbs, the ants and the cleaning up to do. "Honey, get up. I need to clean up the crumbs. And vacuum the floor."

- thinking of using food products to enhance the loving, makes you think of how sticky everything is going to be. "Can you get off me. I need a bath. The whipped cream is sticky and scratchy after it dries."

-thinking of a passionate session on a moonlight night on the beach, makes you think of where the sand can get into. "Argh. That is uncomfortable.."

-thinking of making out in the pool, makes you think of how soaking in chlorine water is not the best thing for your body. "Can we get out now, I am getting wrinkles."

-thinking of him ravishing you in the kitchen, makes you think of making a note to clean the counter/table tomorrow before breakfast. "Must remember. Not to cook before cleaning up!"

And before someone says it,

I know. I am growing old. And Boring. Sigh. HELP!!!

Question

2007-08-20T15:33:00.000-04:00

Something that arose out of the past post on cheating.

"What is cheating?" - H. asked me. I mean is sleeping with someone the worst crime one can commit in a relationship? Would you never trust a guy who cheated on you? What if it is that one time/ honest mistake?

Well, I am not naive to say things like don't happen or that I would not commit such an act. Shit happens. Some things can be resolved. It all depends. But he raises a valuable point. Is physical intimacy the only kind of cheating the absolute no- no in a relationship?

Is it worse if the person you turn to when you are down is not your guy but that dude from office ?

Is fantasizing about that swim suit model when you are in bed with your girlfriend cheating?

Is flirting (I mean the dirty talk kinds flirting) cheating, too?

Would you be upset if your significant other indulges in one or all of these but never commits adultery?

Cheated!

2007-08-20T11:05:00.000-04:00

I never thought I would cheat with the Girlfriend's man. A. I don't cheat on friends and B. I could not understand her fascination for him. He is a needy, whiny so and so.

But as luck would have it, I had to live at her place. And Emma, the darling girl, is no chaperon. So we were stuck together. With him, demanding my company. Well, in the beginning it was nice to come home to somebody. Just have someone greet you at the door. And be glad that you are back. To sit with someone on the sofa drinking chilled beer. Watch movies with. You get the picture. I have been deprived of company. And since both Actin and Girlfriend were away, I was forced to stay with the Boy. And as one does when one lives with someone, I picked up on his moods and habits and figured where the attraction lies.

The boy is self centred (yeah, I know.. look who's talking). He not only wants your complete attention all the time but he also demands your undivided love. Which means when he enters the room, everything else ceases to exist. Earlier, I preferred playing with Emma to talking with the boy. She is adorable and loves to play with the ball. My kinda girl. Where as he is laid back, would rather lounge around and just do nothing. A couch potato! Something that gets on my nerves (unless of course I am doing it ;-)). But as we hung out over the weekend, I realized that he is like a drug - addictive. You hate him for making you a slave to his attentions. You want him to get away and give you some breathing room. And yet when he leaves you to pontificate in the bedroom.. you miss him.

What got me was the immensely pleasurable thing -He cuddles!! Women, you know what I am talking about. Here is a guy who just wants to spoon with you at night. Nothing more. Just because he wants to feel close to you. He will crawl in next to you and just watch you breathe. I got suckered in. That kind of attention, damn, it's been so long since a guy just wanted to be held by me :)

So I finally gave in last night. I slept with him. And more unusually (for me that is), I seem to have fallen in love with him. I love Eli!! There I said it.

I confessed to the girlfriend,"Getting up to his purring self... was heaven indeed!" And that I was not sorry that I did it. It was simply unforgettable.

She told me that she had worried that I would be suckered in by his magnificent catty self. I understand now why she loves him so much. He is a woman's man ;) And I am sure the girlfriend is glad that I am moving my ass away from her man.

PS-Of course I was talking with about the CAT! I don't cheat with my girlfriend's men - the two legged kind that is. Friends are worth more than a 15 minute pleasure trip.

Friday Audio

2007-08-17T00:13:00.000-04:00

Leaving on a Jet Plane. Movie- Armageddon. Sung by Chantal Kreviazuk. Written by John Denver in 1967.

Leaving on a jet plane

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standin' here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn
The taxi's waitin', he's blowin' his horn
Already I'm so lonesome I could die

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I'll tell you now, they don't mean a thing

Every place I go, I think of you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
When I come back I'll wear your wedding ring

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, oh, let me kiss you
And close your eyes and I'll be on my way

Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave alone
About the times that I won't have to say ...

Oh, kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

And I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

But I'm leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)

Once more with feeling..

2007-08-16T18:18:00.001-04:00

Disclaimer - This arose out of a discussion (the other side will remain anon as he/she/it demanded of us). If you know who I am talking about, please don't give the said person a hard time! Well, not a really hard time :D

So normally my friends never ask me about declaration for love and such. For all the verbal diarrhoea I am capable of "I am in love with you" is a phrase I have never uttered. Mostly it was gleaned from our behavior. I have been alternatingly thankful for that and also aghast that our actions could be interpreted in such a sappy way!

But coming back to the main point, a friend recently is hoping to propose to the significant other. And was hoping to say something significant. Well, that's where I was roped in. To say something without sounding cheesy (which for the person meant NO poetry!!! If a man is going to propose, we demand profound prose of how we mean the universe and such like.. but anyways..). Now I am never speechless (yes, I know - I am a constant pain in the ear for a whole lot of you).. but I could not come up with something without it sounding cheesy.

I of course gave him the Spike speech - since both of us were avid Slayer fans (and hence the reason it finds a home on my vodpod) but that is cheesy too (at least to a person who is not a Buffy fan). Nice but cheesy. To me the whole declaration of love is cheesy. Why one needs to state the obvious is beyond me. But then I guess sometimes words are important. Well, I thought and discussed this with a few of my girl friends who are more experienced in this matter (meaning they have heard it and returned the sentiment - I have once replied to the professed feeling with a heart felt thank you and then once with, ditto.. . a la Ghost. Did not go well, in either case, but ah well..) and they gave me the whole "it depends on the mood" "it's how it is said" "its when it is said" "you just know the right moment"... in short no one had a fail proof formula - so I designed mine with a mixture of all that they said. Here is my plan - I need a sizable population to try it out (after signing disclaimer to abuse experienced)..

A. Pick a person (yes, professing self love is not going to get you the tax benefits).
B. Date them (Preferably for an extended period of time - in my opinion indefinitely or at least till they start whining about where are we heading)
C. Then either take them to a romantic setting - the beach/secluded woods was the number one choice- and tell them how much they mean to you. I advice you practice this speech. So that the words are not difficult to say. Try not to envision that this will mean you NEVER get to kiss another or hold another person in your arms. The forever vision can be crippling to your senses.
(Ps- Guys, most importantly, your bedroom is not a romantic setting! And saying it before sex does not count. True, that is when you would profess all sorts of things and really mean it - we prefer when you say it along with the cuddling!)
D. Look them in their eyes and say it, "I want to spend the rest of my life with you "(refrain from words like shackled, stuck or dreaming of singlehood). Don't rush the words - enunciate them. Say it as if you mean it. Girls, say it as if you are holding a puppy in your arms or that dress you coveted or that diamond ring. Guys, say it as if it is that dream car you always wanted or that kick ass TV or as if someone has given you a free pass to the world cup/world series - front row tickets with access to the players!
E. After you have said it - DON'T Wince. Or Cringe or close your eyes in pain. It is difficult but it will get better - at least till you see the next person who makes your pulse race , then nothing can be done for your overwhelming sense of sadness..
F. Then proceed to kiss the heck out of them. No one says you should not get any pleasure out of it!

I think this should work. Why someone would want to get themselves shackled is beyond the meagre understanding of this person. But statistically speaking if you sample a large pool and use this strategy without sample bias, you will get yourself hitched..

If anyone else has any other plan, please help my friend. I promise to make sure the first child is named after you or better yet, you can name the child what ever your heart desires...

Dil Maange ...

2007-08-15T14:54:00.000-04:00

I miss

-Radio Aakashwani, especially the 6 am Vande Mataram!

-The Doordarshan news, mostly the tune not the anchors- for some reason that soundtrack plays in my head each time I sit to watch the news, yes on any channel.

- The chatter in a language I love, either Marathi or Hindi.

-The street noises - from the "tring-tring" of the cycle vendor to the shouts of vegetable vendor, from the enterprising "bhandiya" of the utensil sellers to the "Out hai!" of children playing cricket. One can not think of home without thinking about the how alive the streets sound.

-Drinking Kingfisher - the 650 ml of chilled goodness (the one bottled in Ameerika stinks big time!) with friends and talking about anything and everything late at night.

-Eating at dhabas. Heck, eating at any road side eatery. Hell, eating what ever my heart desires, Desi style!

-Walking in sabzi-mandis (farmer's market). The sights, the sounds and yes, the smell!

-The streets. Of Mumbai mostly. The busy hustle bustle of people, the cars, the two wheelers and the cabbies. The incessant honking and cussing. The noise and the pollution.

-The rickshaws blaring music, even though it is Himesh's surrrrrrrrrrrr.. I miss those decked up rickshaws and the totally unfit woofers and speakers they have.

-The people - the massive outpouring from the locals at Churchgate or VT. The overwhelming sense of being alone in a crowd.

-Watching cricket. With friends. Or with strangers at a road side TV.

-Riding a bike (a motorcycle), just zipping and zig-zagging in the traffic.

-The clothes fluttering on the lines on a hot summer day.

-Raising the volume and singing along when they play the old favorite songs or advertisements on TV (check here and here for some classics).

-The Rains or rather the Monsoon season. Drinking hot coffee and eating garam pakora on the window seat. Just listening to the rain as it drenches the Earth.

-The Marine drive at night. The Queens necklace. The beach and the traffic zipping by. Need I say more?

Sigh! Yes, Dil Mange More....

Happy Independence Day

2007-08-15T00:01:00.001-04:00

India turns 60!

While there are numerous songs one associates with 15 August, my favorite forever remains Lata singing the memorable lines penned down by Kavi Pradeep. Composed by C. Ramchandra.

Aye Mere Watan Ke ...

Aye mere vatan ke logon tum khoob laga lo naara
ye shubh din hai ham sab ka lahara lo tiranga pyaara
par mat bhoolo seema par veeron ne hai praan ganvaaye
kuch yaad unhein bhi kar lo jo laut ke ghar na aaye

Aye mere vatan ke logon zara aankh mein bhar lo paani
jo shaheed hue hain unki zara yaad karo qurbaani
jab ghayal hua himaalay khatre mein padi aazadi
jab tak thi saans lade vo phir apni laash bichha di
sangeen pe dhar kar maatha so gaye amar balidaani
jo shaheed...

Jab desh mein thi diwali vo khel rahe the holi
jab ham baithe the gharon mein vo jhel rahe the goli
the dhanya javaan vo aapane thi dhanya vo unki javaani
jo shaheed ...

Koi sikh koi jaat maraatha koi gurakha koi madaraasi
sarahad pe maranevaala har veer tha bhaaratavaasi
jo khoon gira parvat par vo khoon tha hindustaani
jo shaheed...

Thi khoon se lath-path kaaya phir bhi bandook uthaake
das-das ko ek ne maara phir gir gaye hosh ganva ke
jab ant-samay aaya to kah gaye ke ab marate hain
khush rahana desh ke pyaaron ab ham to safar karate hain
kya log the vo deewane kya log the vo abhimaani
jo shaheed...

Tum bhool na jaao unko is liye kahi ye kahaani
jo shaheed hue hain unki zara yaad karo qurbaani
jay hind jay hind ki sena
jay hind, jay hind, jay hind

A song that makes me tear up, each time. Here's to all the brave soldiers who have laid down their life so that I would live in peace. You will never be forgotten.

Adoption In India -2

2007-08-14T19:13:00.000-04:00

The concluding part of my Adoption series.

A safe, happy home is the best environment for a child to grow and develop.
As clichéd as it may sound, India’s future lies in her children. However, with
millions of poor, undernourished and abandoned children, India needs a better legislative framework to facilitate adoption.

Touchy - Feely Issues.

2007-08-14T12:19:00.000-04:00

I travelled in a packed bus to school today. Not even elbow room. Chattering of students, other workers trying to read their newspapers while some people were trying catch that extra 20 minutes of sleep. The minute I climbed into that bus, I was taken back to the countless journeys I made in Mumbai locals.

Crowded buses or trains in Mumbai meant you were going to get groped. It meant the 50 year old guy who probably had a daughter your age at home feeling you up. Or that random person who inched close to you while standing in the bus to keep brushing up your body. Or the village idiot who pinched your boob just as you were trying to get down at Dadar while hundreds of bodies trying to get in. While I agree that not every man I came across in Mumbai indulged in this, the law of averages meant that most women who travel in Mumbai are subject to unwanted lecherous feel-ups. And I should really say girls. I remember the anger and self loathing I went through each time I travelled in the locals and it started when I was barely 12! It never diminished. I don't know how bad or good living else where in India is. From what I gather, life is marginally better in smaller towns. I say marginally as even in Nashik, I was used to the rikshawallas adjusting their rear view mirrors to focus on the women's boobs. So there is a varying degree of this disgusting behaviour that most women are exposed to growing up in India.

I contrasted that today with an equally packed bus but a completely friendly and safe atmosphere. I did not cringe or yell or try to pack myself in a small corner to avoid human contact in the bus. This has been true for my entire stay here. To be fair, most of it was in a small university town. But I have never been exposed to it when I was a tourist in NY or Chicago or Florida or Seattle.

Does this mean that women are never cat-called or teased in US? No!
Is there a danger of assault and rape? Of course! Human behaviour does not change across country lines.
Will I be groped in US? Sure. But the danger is not as prominent as when I was back home.

Which makes me wonder why the behavior is more prominent in India? And will it ever go away. Is it because we are such a sexually repressed people? Or because women are held as objects in our society? Will Blank noise and similar protests work in generating awareness or are they mere blips in the baby-batter filled men's brains?

Is there any workable solution to eve-teasing in India? Suggestions?

Adoption In India -1

2007-08-13T20:37:00.000-04:00

Parenthood is parenthood. It is about holding a child in your arms and dreaming beautiful dreams for it and then slogging your ass off to make them all possible. The child's biological origins don't matter. I admire people who open their heart to children who need the love and care of a family.
This is part one of my guest post on a blog I frequently read, Policy wise.

With about 12.5 million orphan children and only 300 licensed NGOs helping to place them (source – indianngos.com) and an average placement time of 18 months with infants, the odds are not placed in favor of the kids or for foreign nationals hoping to adopt Indian kids. In India only 4000 kids are adopted each year and 320 visas were issued to orphaned immigrants by US in 2006. In lieu of this abysmal rate of adoption, the recent decision by CARA to shorten the proceedings to two months is welcome.

Go read the rest!

Ps. if anyone has a story about adoption, do tell.

Changed

2007-08-12T22:24:00.001-04:00

I was told today that I have changed a lot by a friend who has known me from my infancy. Of course, I have changed. Isn't that what life is all about - we grow, we change?

And of course when one is so far from perfection as I am, one has plenty of opportunities to improve (of course one must never open door to strangers, so Opportunity knocks away, we ignore her). Lame joke.. but when one is drunk, one tends to be lame...

Yes, it also is a lesson I never learnt, not to type posts when one is drinking. For then nothing makes sense. But then when do I aim to make sensible comments ..heheheheh.. so here goes...

Well now that I am on my third glass of the fine quality wine (well, box wine is fine quality for cheap ass students, wokay!), I realize that everything in life is about change - relationships change, emotions change, likes and dislikes change.. in reality everything around you is changing. And however much one wishes for time to stand still, it never does.

So when everything in life is about change, why do we hunger for permanency? Why do we want things we want to outlast everything when in reality we may not feel the same about it in the near future? Case in point, I have a perfectly great record player at home - in the best condition still plays LPs but I never use it anymore. I prefer my portable iPOD. Isn't that what happens in a relationship, too? So why are we not happy in the here and now? If present is unpredictable and ever changing, why do we seek for assurances and promises to here after?

I want my now to be happy. It is the only tangible quantity to me - today, here and now - this moment. Who knows if I will even be alive tomorrow? So why should I care about whether someone promises me thousand tomorrows?

RNAi

2007-08-12T17:05:00.001-04:00

Nobel Laureate Craig Mello explains RNAi.

Excellent talk!

Peeves..

2007-08-11T11:37:00.000-04:00

It's not even 9 am and already have been exposed to two things I get irritated by...

Watching sports with girls.
I love sports. To me, if you are going to comment on the game - say something intelligent. Talk about the shot, the ball, the brilliant attempt at fielding - anything but who is more cute! Just don't talk girly nonsense when watching a great sport.
I don't want my sports commentary diluted by who looks fit at 35, or who is a hottie, or how Panesar with his Brit accent is sexy.. I just don't! I want my commentary to state how the ball was bowled, what a magnificent drive it was and more importantly how India has this match in it's bag!
Never watch a match with a women who say they love the sport but don't know what is the difference between mid-off and mid on!
Spoilt my cricket match. UGH! Women!!!

Figuring out which one of the couple is signed on the chat!!
A request for all my married or in a serious relationship friends - please continue to keep your/her alone mail accounts. I really don't want to be calling your prudish girlfriend some choicest names. Neither do I want to tell your guy about my PMS. So please keep the two accounts separate. If you sign on using the other's name - put it as your G-chat status!

Looks like it is going to be a long coffee drinking day!

Random Musings

2007-08-10T12:47:00.000-04:00

Thank you all for the sweet mails that asked me if I was alive and doing fine! As the recent posts must have made clear, I was in middle of my move. Drove 2000 miles and did not kill myself or any one else. Sadly only few people were contacted during the rigorous drive, just to let them know not to send the usher to bury me! So sorry to put you all through the worry...

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I have now settled in (as in I have a bed!)the new apartment. I am moving up - I now live in a truly gated community! I have my own magnetic key to open the door... woo hooo... For those who have not lived in small town, back in Lex a gated community meant a gate (that was never locked)with a foot of brick wall and that's it! The complex is huge with two pools and a tennis court - yeah, I am thinking of going there (right now only thinking :P)

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People here are exercise and health nuts! I mean I feel guilty ordering cream cheese with my bagel.. So I might start exercising and eating healthy .. yeah, the things we do to fit in :) And may be I will lose the "thesis gut" ;)

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Seriously thinking of joining a social group - may be ASHA or CRY. Time to give back to the community. And may be then, I can pretend to have a life! I mean, if I can volunteer my time for a cause, it means I have time to spare, no?

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The new work space is very laid back. Such a big change from the old one. I am still getting used to the lack of pressure and work your own time schedule thing. Luckily the people here are absolutely friendly - there is no competition between post docs in the lab which means that each one of us grows as an individual.
I am just getting my head wrapped around the terminology (even though I come from related work, I feel they are talking Latin sometimes :))and getting around the department.

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Most frequent question I got after I said I was the new post doc was "what does your husband do" which was changed to "Oh, your fiancee or boyfriend?" which rapidly changed to "Oh, I am really sorry to assume that!" WTF!!! People.. it is OK to remain single- you try having a life while working 16 hours a day! Hmph.. on other hand, there are plenty of good looking guys around.. hmmmm....

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So that's all folks.. Ladki ab tak maari nahi hai.. and no suuuuuuuicide.. so no chakki peeessing for all of you :)

Friday Audio

2007-08-10T00:36:00.001-04:00

I don't know why I am reminded of this song today, but for the whole evening I have been humming, "Yeh kahan aa gaye hum". Sung by Lata with Amitabh's voice reciting the beautiful words penned by Javed Akhtar from the movie Silsila. Music by Shiv Hari.

yeh kahan aa gaye hum

Main aur meri tanhaai aksar yeh baatein karte hain
Tum hoti to kaisa hota, tum yeh kehti, tum voh kehti
Tum is baat pe hairaan hoti, tum us baat pe kitni hansti
Tum hoti to aisa hota, tum hoti to vaisa hota
Main aur meri tanhaai aksar yeh baatein karte hain

Yeh kahan aa gaye hum
Yunhi saath saath chalte
Teri baahon mein hai jaanam
Mere jism-o-jaan pighalte
Yeh kahan aa gaye hum
Yunhi saath saath chalte

Yeh raat hai, yeh tumhaari zulfein khuli hui hai
Hai chaandni ya tumhaari nazrein se meri raatein dhuli hui hai
Yeh chaand hai ya tumhaara kangan
Sitaarein hai ya tumhaara aanchal
Hawa ka jhonka hai ya tumhaare badan ki khushboo
Yeh pattiyon ki hai sarsaraahat ke tumne chupke se kuch kaha hai
Yeh sochta hoon main kab se gumsum
Ke jab ki mujhko bhi yeh khabar hai
Ke tum nahin ho, kahin nahin ho
Magar yeh dil hai ke keh raha hai
Ke tum yahin ho, yahin kahin ho

Tu badan hai main hoon chhaaya
Tu na ho to main kahan hoon
Mujhe pyaar karne waale
Tu jahan hai main vahan hoon
Hamein milna hi tha hamdam
Issi raah pe nikalte
Yeh kahan aa gaye hum
Yunhi saath saath chalte

Meri saans saans maheke
Koi bheena bheena chandan
Tera pyaar chaandni hai
Mera dil hai jaise aangan
Hui aur bhi mulaayam
Meri shaam dhalte dhalte
Yeh kahan aa gaye hum
Yunhi saath saath chalte

Majboor yeh haalaat, idhar bhi hai udhar bhi
Tanhaai ki ek raat, idhar bhi hai udhar bhi
Kehne ko bahut kuch hai, magar kisse kahe hum
Kab tak yunhi khaamosh rahe aur sahe hum
Dil kehta hai duniya ki har ek rasm utha de
Deevaar jo hum dono mein hai, aaj gira de
Kyoon dil mein sulagte rahe, logon ko bata de
Haan humko mohabbat hai, mohabbat hai, mohabbat
Ab dil mein yehi baat, idhar bhi hai udhar bhi

Yeh kahan aa gaye hum
Yunhi saath saath chalte
Yeh kahan aa gaye hum

Sigh!that voice.. sends up shivers down my spine.. if only.. sigh!

How time flies...

2007-08-09T20:00:00.000-04:00

Six years ago today, I arrived in Lexington all by myself.
And now, I find myself alone in a new city once again.

Six years ago, I missed M and S, back home - two people who always had my back.
And now, I miss M and S's, back in Lexington - they put with me!

Six years ago, I knew nothing about what I was doing.
And now, I find myself in the same boat.

So things change and yet, they remain the same...

What I did ...

2007-08-08T20:11:00.000-04:00

Some 2000 odd miles have been covered in the last 4 days..
The only fun stop was the Grand canyon.
Now, I need to just sleep and then sleep some more..
Blogging will resume in a day or so :)

Friday Audio

2007-08-03T10:38:00.000-04:00

If someone asks me what song would feature at the top of your all time favorite list, it would be "Woh Shyam Kuch Ajeeb Thi" sung by Kishor Kumar, composed by Hemant Kumar featured in the film Khamoshi. Lyrics by Gulzar.

WOH SHAAM KUCH.

Woh shaam kuchh ajeeb thi, yeh shaam bhi ajeeb hai
Woh kal bhi paas paas thi woh aaj bhi kareeb hai
Woh shaam kuchh ajeeb thi

Jhuki hui nigaahon mein, kahin mera khayaal tha
Dabi dabi hansi mein ik, haseen saa gulaal tha
Main sochta tha, mera naam gunguna rahi hai woh
Na jaane kyon laga mujhe, ke muskura rahi hai woh
Woh shaam kuchh ajeeb thi

Mera khayaal hai abhi jhuki hui nigaah mein
Khuli hui hansi bhi hai, dabi hui si chaah mein
Main janta hoon, mera naam gunguna rahi hai woh
Yahi khayaal hai mujhe, ke saath aa rahi hai woh
Woh shaam kuchh ajeeb thi, yeh shaam bhi ajeeb hai
Woh kal bhi paas paas thi woh aaj bhi kareeb hai
Woh shaam kuchh ajeeb thi

Just plain fantastic...

Friendship

2007-08-01T08:56:00.000-04:00

I was in the coffee shop last evening and two young girls were chatting nonstop. It took me back to my school days- S (I don’t like to call her Sakshi, her real name is much more beautiful) and me were like that.
We stayed just one block away. We would go to school/college together, come back together, get down midway somewhere to our houses, and then go to drop the other to her house! -all the time chatting about something, till the deadline, 8 pm in both the houses (yes we had a deadline to get back home :() After that we could use the telephone to carry on our ‘important unfinished’ conversations.
Today, even if I think hard, I cannot recall even one of our conversations. But just to give you an idea of how engrossing such discussions were, one day we went for a morning walk and came back only after 2 hours- we lost count of time since we were discussing something very important. Both our families had alerted the police and search parties were sent for us! :)
I am always amazed by our friendship. We are both very different by nature. I am a rather emotional person and S does not show her emotions very easily. I am a very people’s person and S has her strong likes and dislikes as far as people are concerned. (Give her a book to read and she won’t notice anyone else in the room! Ask her mom about her reading habit on the dining table….she still gets irritated :P)
But we think alike. We understand each other very well and respect where the other is coming from. Put us in a room and someone is prone to be a victim of our innocent pranks. One of our Chemistry teacher always saw to it that we did not sit together, since we tended to pass notes and in general disrupt the class. I would be on the 2nd last bench and she would be on the last (she is taller than me). Little did she realize that distance did not make any difference to our mischief, and we just got more people embroiled into our "discussions".
We have known each other for more than half our lives. We have been with each other through the proverbial ‘thick and thin". From innocent childhood days to growing into responsible adults, we have shared our lives with each other without the fear of being judged. From collaborating on making coffee to trying our hands at business together-held an ‘exhibition cum sale’ for children’s clothing :), we were always game for adventures, if we were together.
For all the things she posts on her blog about herself, S is the best friend one could ever have in the world. I am not as good with words as you, S – but this is just to let you know, you are the ‘bestest’ friend and will always be. Here’s to our friendship!
And this quote is apt for you:

"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." -- Bernard Meltzer.

BTW I am the cracked egg here! :D
(For those of you who need more info on the adventures of the ‘RT girl-S’ E-mail me separately.)

This is a guest post written by my "bestest" friend, Madhuli. And take her up on the offer to know more about me, but beware she is the spin- machine when it comes to me .. for example she thinks I am nice!! *shudder*

Question

2007-07-29T11:09:00.000-04:00

What do you call a girl,

- who has one suitcase full of clothes (that's it! All of her clothes) but has three full of books*, one each of DVDs and Music?

Apart from hopeless that is..

* this after dumping a whole lot of them on the girlfriend :)

I am depressed. I never thought a day would come when I would have to chose one book over the other. But that is what is keeping me occupied, work by day and packing by night. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Keep this, sell that, junk that or pass it on..

I wish I could go back to the time when all I had to decide was whether I go the lab at 9 am or 10 am on Sunday. Those were the days!

Friday Audio

2007-07-26T17:46:00.000-04:00

Sahir Ludhianvi's nazm in Amitabh's voice. Film: Kabhi Kabhi.

powered by ODEO

Khayyam composition. Singer's Mukesh and Lata.

Kabhi Kabhi -Mukesh

There are two versions of the poem "Kabhi Kabhie" - one is the romantic poem Amit (Amitabh) sings to Pooja (Rakhee)when they are in love, and the other version, rewritten by a shattered Amit when Pooja marries Vijay (Shashi Kapoor), is a bitter, self-hating ode of misery and loss. Sahir Ludhianvi wrote the latter version of "Kabhi Kabhie" first; the more romantic version was written for the film [Source: Wiki]

And yes, I love Sahir's first attempt, from his book TALKHIYAN -

Kabhi kabhi mere dil mein khayal aata hai
Ke zindagi teri zulfon ki narm chaon mein
Guzarne pati to shaadaab ho bhi sakti thi
Ye tiragi jo mere zeest ka muqaddar hai
Teri nazar ki shuaon mein kho bhi sakti thi

Ajab na tha ke main begana--e-alam hokar
Tere jamal ki ranaion mein kho rahta
Tera gadaz badan teri neem baaz aankhen
Inheen haseen fasanon mein mahv ho rahta

Pukarteen mujhe jab talkhiyan zamane ki
Ter labon se halawat ke ghoont pe leta
Hayat cheekhti phirti barahna dar mein
Ghaneri zulfon ke saaye mein chup ke jee leta

Magar yeh ho na saka aur ab yeh aalam hai
Ke tu nahin tera gham teri justjoo bhi nahin
Guzar rahi hai kuch is tarah zindagi jaise
Ise kisi ke sahare ki aarzoo bhi nahin

Zamaan bhar ke dukhon ko laga chuka hoon gale
Guzar raha hoon kuch anjani rahguzaron se
Muhib saaye meri simt barhte aate hain
Hayat-o-maut ke purhaul kharzaron
Na koi jaadah na manzil na roshni ka suragh
Bhatak rahi hai khalaon mein zindagi meri
Inheen khalaon mein rah jaaonga kabhi kho kar
Main jaanta hoon meri humnafas magar yunhi

Kabhi kabhi mere dil mein khayal aata hai

Urdu Helper -
SHADAB=fresh;delightful
TIRAGI=darkness
ZIST=life
SHUAON =light
BAGANA=not related;stranger
ILM=knowledge
JAMAL=beauty
RANAION=grace;elegance
GADAZ=soft
NEEM BAAZ=half open
MAHV =drowned
TALKHIYAN=bitterness
HALAWAT=relish;deliciousness
HAYAT=life;existence
BARAHNA=bare;naked
SARA=inn
DAR=gate;door
GHANERI=thick
JUSTJOO=search
AARZOO=hope;desire
RAHGUZARON=passage
MUHIB=dreadful
SIMT=direction
JADAAH= path
SURAGH=trace;clue
KHALAON=vacuum;space
HUMNAFAS=friend

Ps. Does anyone have the poem in it's entirety in Amitabh's voice? I would appreciate it very much.
Edited in -Correction by Lalit .. thanks a lot!

Mastercard Moment

2007-07-25T09:09:00.000-04:00

This is the best e-mail I got from H. so far -

You just have to come up with twenty questions and break the ice, y'know, how long do you intend to talk about the weather and such? You like a person and you got to ask him things, important things. I don't what is important to you girls but there has to be something! I mean you fuss about your shoes matching a dress so you would have something that matters to you, right? So go for it! Ask.
And you know what she asks me? What is your favorite color!!!! What is wrong with you women?

Hahahhahahaa.
Date in Central Park- $50.00
The nice bottle of Chardonnay - $35.00
Ride in the park - free (you cheapo!)
H (the self proclaimed connoisseur of the better sex) disgusted with women- Priceless!!!

Btw- how would you break ice with someone on the date?

Just FYI..

2007-07-23T17:19:00.000-04:00

I usually think that I am the only one delusional in life (and also a little schizo but we will let that one slide by, unnoticed). So I am constantly surprised that other people end up on this space and expect profound thoughts. This is aimed to save them that trouble...

Are you for real?
No. Mostly I am a figment of my own imagination. Sometimes, your own basal thoughts sustain me. But reality and I don't co-exist. Sorry, if you think I am real, then my friend, you need some serious help. I can recommend some doctors.

Do you have to be so condescending to Desis?
No. I don't have to be anything. I am an equal op hater. I actually extend the same condescending attitude towards people who question good science,who believe in god, or those believe in all sorts of crappy things - soul mate, astrology and marriage- in short mostly everybody.

Do you know that quality is better than quantity?
Hmm. Such abstract concepts are difficult for my brain to comprehend. But we sense some sarcasm leveled at us - and as usual things that can possibly get us to examine our true selves are mostly ignored.

You come off as a rude bitch with no good values.
Yes, we like being our true selves. Mostly. When the nice one takes over, life becomes boring. So we try to keep her sedated and out of the way.

You are repetitive. And mostly ho-hum. There are better bloggers than you.
You nailed me! I , me (rather all of us) agree that I am a mediocre blogger with no talent and no originality. And your analysis of this blog deserves a standing ovation.

Don't you have anything better to do?
Not really. Killing old women and hurting young kids and torturing the innocent and ruling the world becomes boring after some time.

You should try and get a real life.
Being utterly lazy, we ask that you get us one. Till then our delusional tale satisfies us.

Most of your readers are males who read your posts because you talk about sex.
Kudos! You should team up with the other two observers (or may be like me you also suffer from split personality). But yes, most of my readers here are males. The females that hang out here are a figment of my imagination!

Why is the email so long?
The long email is just to make sure only the really sincere mail me. That saves me the trouble of actually replying.

How much of what you write is true?
Sir, I claim to be delusional. So how do you expect me to answer this?

What will your family think of this blog?
"Why are we not mentioned more? And *Ahem* you lose half the verbal battles with all of us" will be said to us (and they are lying!!)

Don't you think you should tone this blog down?
For all intent and purposes, I don't think. So your request is put into the will see tomorrow bin!

I would love to meet with you.
So would I. Love to meet with me, that is. But sadly I have had no luck so far. I will let you know how it goes. Keep dropping by on the blog till then.

Eh!

2007-07-23T15:29:00.001-04:00

When asked name one thing you are proud of, I replied

"I am toilet trained and have table manners."

When asked where is your mother (by the telemarketer), I replied

"She ran away with the milkman."

When asked how did you manage to get a PhD (almost), I replied

"The boob job helps."

When asked what I do for fun, I replied

"Hurt the young and the innocent."

When asked what I want in a man, I replied

"That he be alive."

I know, I need to curb the sarcasm. But then life would be so boring, right?

Potter Tip Off

2007-07-22T13:26:00.000-04:00

Well, since I promised not to reveal all... let me just say the new book is a let down. While certain plots are clever and delighted the Pottermaniac in me, over all the book is a huge disappointment.

And yes, for those who want to know more - this site revealed all, long before the book was released. (Thanks a Lot, Lord!!)

And those who have read it, defend or vent in the comment space. I will try to read some good Sci-fi and get this namby-pamby tale out of my head!

Conversation

2007-07-20T12:20:00.000-04:00

He: Again? He looked at her as she stared out at the sea.
She: I thought things would be different, this time around. I thought the years apart would have done us some good. But it is still the same. Three days, and all the good cheer is stripped away and we are back to yelling and screaming.
He: Give them a break. They are your parents. They want what they think is best for you.
She: Yes, but what they want from me is not what I want or need. I understood their anger a decade ago, I was young and stupid then. But I am an adult now. I have lived on my own for the past ten years and done well. Then why don't they ~~live~~ leave me alone?
He: They equate life's happiness differently.
She: Yeah, with me being married to a professional guy and popping out kids. I don't want that. Just like, going to med school was not what I wanted. Why don't they get it that I am different from their other kids?
He: I know. But they are your parents. You have to deal with it.
She: You know why I did not come home for the past few years? Out there, in that other world, I am successful, I am bright, funny and respected. And I come here within a span of an hour, I am told how much of a disappointment I am. Why cant they like me for who I am?
He: They do. They always tell everyone how proud they are of what you have done.
She: But how does that matter? I want them to say it to me. I am leaving tomorrow. That is why I called you.
He: Going? Already? You said you had a month off!
She: I can't take this for a month. It drains me - this feeling of inadequacy. I grew up with it. All my life I felt as if I was a misfit in that house but I could not do anything about it. Now, I know I am a misfit - I don't share anything with them. It is like sitting with strangers, awkward and stilted conversations, those mental tip-toeing you do with strangers saying the PC things. I cant do that. So I am leaving. I think this relationship works best at a distance.
He: You are running away again. They are not getting any younger, you know. You should resolve this with them. Or you are going to regret it always.
She: Resolve what? Tell them how I feel? That I am jealous of my siblings for being their version of perfect kids? That there are times I hate myself for causing them pain? That even though I know they hate the way I am, I can't change? That for once in my life, I want them to hold me close and say that they love me? Don't you see - it is not just about how they feel anymore. I churn with festered malice, with this impotent anger at them. I fear one of these days, it is all going to spill out. I can't deal with them without hurting them more.
He: But you can improve your relationship with them. Just try. Talk with them. Just share things with them. You talk with me. Just embrace them into your life again.
She: This thing can work only if one of us changes. They won't - they are too ingrained in that habit. And I can't. What they want of me, is the very thing I can't be.
He: So you run off to far away lands. Keeping in touch with mails and phone calls. Is that what you want this relationship to be?
She: I never knew anything else. We never connected. Strange thing for a parent- child, isn't it? But that is how it always was. I am fine with it. So I don't see why you are so upset.
He: I just don't want you to miss the chance of being...
She: what their lovely darling girl? I am that and I never was that. Life is too short to be expected to be perfect in every way. Perfect relationships exists only in books. Real life is warped. I accepted my reality. I don't want to sugar coat it anymore.
He: So when will I see you again?
She: Sometime. I am still their daughter. And I am glutton for punishment. I will stop by. May be next time, I will come without the expectations. Without the hope to see love in their eyes. Without the wish to see them look at me with pride.

Friday Audio

2007-07-19T17:10:00.000-04:00

BongoP'o'ndit's request and since it is already Friday for him..
Tom Waits singing Little Drop Of Poison, from the movie Shrek 2.

Little Drop Of Poison

Twisted 8

2007-07-19T13:56:00.000-04:00

TGFI tagged me! I have arrived!!! Lalit and Shek, your tags are archived and will be done.. but she threatened to close shop on me, wokay.. so I had to do it asap, who else will let me spam, errr comment so much on their space :) But I have talked about myself enough and I really am not a nice person - dissenters will be punished- so I have changed it up. I am going to tell you the eight wrong things I did as a child - the adult years needs reams and reams of pages and would entail therapy for all of you, so lets just skip that!

8. I hated writing and doing homework when I was in school. I rarely wrote anything more than I had to and barely - if things could be said in one word, they would be. Which meant lot of notes to parents about "PTA" meetings.

7. I never liked to waste my time eating lunch in school (was time best occupied playing sports or reading). But since Ma would be hurt if I bought back my lunch, I made other people eat it - whether they liked it or not :)

6. I did not study my entire school years. I was more into other things and yet I was always considered a nerd - so in the end I gave up trying to be "cool"and just became a nerd! I had announced at the age of 5 that one clever kid per household is more that enough and since bhai filled that spot - I should be left alone. And yet, I was made to study! The torture!

5. I used to run away from school, periodically. Instead of staying in the activity class, I hiked the 45-50 minutes walk home - to be with my pets.

4. I blackmailed my siblings (way too often) to be included in their activities - in my defense, I hated playing with dolls and other girly things. The boys did not like it so much, so I was made to field at the boundary, way too often. But then again, if they did not do stupid things I would not have leverage, would I?

3. Mom did not know that I photocopied the letters that she made me write - I mean I have way too many brothers and they all were getting Rakhees.. why write up the same thing over and over again? Sadly, my impeccable logic was lost on her and from then onwards she made sure she sealed each envelope. Yet, when I wrote the letters she made sure of the content! It seems asking money from your brothers is a no- no.. but they give silly gifts like dolls and jewellery. Money is so straight forward, right?

2. I signed my parents name (I can do both - perfectly) on my report cards. And the PTA announcements or anything else that required it. Why should they be bothered, no?

1. I kinda, sorta always sneaked out of the house...so much so that my Dad made it a point to move us into the 3 floor apartment.. it really gave him a false sense of security :D

Ye Ask, We Provide..

2007-07-19T10:50:00.000-04:00

Well, recently I asked you my faithful readers (yes, I can use the plural now...yippeee) to answer some questions. Which you did. Oh so sweet of you to listen to the unreasonable demands I make. But a wise person asked me to return the favor in the comment section. And since I am still hoping to keep the plural readership status, I listen to your demands.. so here goes..

1. Name 3 people in the blogosphere you would really like to meet in real life.

Sayesha - Long time back, this girl wrote a private blog (and still does, yes TGFI- same pinch!!) and preferred to prowl through blogs but never comment. Sash made it hard to keep quiet, with her witty blogs about everyday stuff. Yes, she can be blamed for my profuse commenting ;)

Megha - Mostly because I really, really, really need to rip her CD collection. We suffer from the mostest envy, Megha.

Mike Singer - His pictures make me pick my camera up and take photos. Not as good but something is better than nothing.

And before someone (yes, I expect a few outcries.. in fact I demand a protest!)leaves a comment taking offense, Yes sirree. you too ;)

2. Do you think a blogger's persona matches his/her real life image?
It reflects who they are but does not reveal all. The few I met are as funny as they seem on their blog but they are more than just what they share. And then there are some who are incredibly funny and yet write about serious stuff. And then there are a few who write pithy posts but like to chat a lot in person. So go figure.

3. Would you prefer to blog anon/ under a pseudo name / with your true identity? Why?
Well, I started anon and then got ousted. So I now blog under my professional name. For the most part my regular readers know about me. So I think in my case it is a moot point.

4. Do you have a story about a blog-friend that you are willing to share ?
Plenty of them. There's this guy (who wants to remain anon) who has been my reader since the beginning, mailed me the entire Douglas Adams Trilogy on my birthday. So sweet! And no, before you guys speculate - he is married and so not available :(

And see, how I always try to respond to your inquiries? In fact, ask today and you just might get a straight answer.
Offer valid for limited time only.
Time limit will be specified at the author's whim. Really, everything is up to the author's fancy and her attention span is very limited! So get to it, pronto!!

Parent Trap

2007-07-18T10:26:00.000-04:00

Mom:So, do you have an apartment lined up?

Me: Looking into it.

Mom: *sounds uncertain* And you are living with another Indian girl, right?

Me: nope. A boy. American.

Mom: Old? *Hopeful note creeping in.*

Me: Gosh, No! Barely legal. Trainable age. Catch them young, is what I say.

Mom: Why do I even talk with you?

Me: Parental obligations?

Mom: Yeah. If I did not remember the birth pains, I would swear you were adopted.

Me: Yeah, that and Dad would not like to hear you and some alien doing it, or else you could just pretend I was an alien spawn!

Mom: Really!! Pity, he is sensitive about such stuff. Anyway, how are you moving up there?

Me: Driving.

Mom: Alone?

Me: No, with a friend.

Mom: Oh! So nice of your friends to come up with you.

Me: err. Mom. Not my friends. It's with this guy I know.

Mom: You never told me you were dating?

Me: I am not, Ma. He is just some one I met on the net *OK. While this is technically true, it is not exactly as it sounds like but since it really gets her going, I do not rephrase such sentences :D*

Mom: *Rama vachav re (Lord help me)* Why do you do this?

Me: Because I am adopted?

Mom: Huh. Most of the times, I am sure of it.

Me: I know. I am such a pain in the ass. That is the reason I remain single.

Mom: But why should I alone have to put up with your nonsense?

Me: Sigh. Alright. I will go and make some random guy really miserable.

Mom: I guess as long as you are at least sticking with the guys I should be OK.

Me: Mom, err..

Mom: On the other hand, as long as it is a person I really don't mind.

Me: How come any topic I bring up now ends up with my getting married?

Mom: I am your mother after all. I can dish out, too !

Still Alive

2007-07-16T09:57:00.000-04:00

Yes, I am fine. I am just off blogging for a bit. Need to regroup and refocus and all that..

My phone has really gone bonkers (it was not just me not picking it up this weekend). So don't worry, I am still alive and have not managed to wipe myself off this planet, yet :D *And for all those who heaved a sigh of relief, I will hold you to it when I am back to bugging you 24/7 :P*

So to keep you all occupied here, answer these please -

1. Name 3 people in the blogosphere you would really like to meet in real life.

2. Do you think a blogger's persona matches his/her real life image?

3. Would you prefer to blog anon/ under a pseudo name / with your true identity? Why?

4. Do you have a story about a blog-friend that you are willing to share ?

The forum belongs to you the readers now.. have at it.

Such Is Life..

2007-07-14T17:22:00.000-04:00

There are days when I wish I could disappear without a trace, leaving behind no proof of my existence - no pictures, no memories - like I never existed.

There are days when I wish I could just be invisible, an ethereal presence watching over people I love, a voyeur and a fairy..living life through them but not really living.

There are such days.. sadly. And then there is life..

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Track details

A Feministic Take By The Lord!

2007-07-13T12:08:00.000-04:00

Mrinal Pandey, a woman, butchers the idea about Feminism.

The Lord of the Blogosphere, who purportedly dislikes feminism (or so he claims), gets it right.

His take on the Government’s decision to monitor pregnancies is right on!

The key to saving female babies is empowering mothers, ensuring education and economic independence for them. They are frequently dismissed as long term measures. That is not always true, districts in Punjab by launching a concerted campaign with the involvement of the local people and medical professionals have shown a drastic improvement in as little as five years. Unless women are the primary decision makers when it comes to matters of their own body, there is little hope of improvement. [Emphasis mine]

Go read his post!
Looks like we have a closet Feminist in our midst, Sistahs! Go support him!

Friday Audio

2007-07-12T17:59:00.000-04:00

When I asked Megha (whose tastes in music strangely echo mine though her knowledge would put me to shame and yes, this is shameless name dropping - I know famous people in the Blogosphere :P) to send me something to put up for Friday Audio, I knew I would be enthralled with the song.

Here's her suggestion, a lovely haunting Lata melody - "Saathi re". Music Director -Salil Chaudhary. Movie- Poonam ki raat. Lyricist -Shailendra.

Saathi re.mp3

Amazing rendition by Lata. Pitch perfect. I am not a Lata fan but after this song even I have to say, Subhan allah!
Megha pointed out the Salilda pulls one of his trademarks - including the tune of another song as an interlude. At time 2.08 in this track, the interlude is the tune of "Baag mein kali khili bagiya mehki" from the movie, Chand aur Suraj.

Hope you all like the song, too!

This Is Not Feminism..

2007-07-10T17:15:00.001-04:00

Mrinal Pande is not my favorite columnist. Normally I would not invest so much energy in reading and critiquing her column but this time what she spews would make every feminist, heck, any intelligent woman cringe. In her latest article on why Pratibha Patil's election to the President's office is a hurrah for feminism, she rambles about media's false image of feminism "taking the son to school on a scooterette as the ultimate act of self-assertion, diamonds as the real fire within a woman’s soul" and somehow ties it all to how electing a woman to power will help women break free of the said media image and gain true sense of self respect. It was truly my WTF moment of the day.

Let me tell you something, Ms. Pande,

Feminism believes in equal rights for men and women. So in essence having reservations or gender based nominations, by itself, voids the belief. Woman all over will agree that we do need reservation to break into places which for historical reasons have been denied to us, to give us a leg up, so to speak. But by nominating incompetent women, are we not basically handing over the case to our dissenters?

Most people are not arguing the case against Patil as a case against womanhood. It is a matter of what she brings to the table. Right now, she seems to be a woman who talks with the dead, is implicated in financial vagaries, has talked about forcible sterilization during the emergency period, and more. This does not smell like a competent woman being held down but sounds more like a rightful concern in a democracy. The Presidency might be just a ceremonial post in India but does that also mean that we should appoint any woman to that post? If yes, then you are really not advocating feminism, in any way.

More ever, it is not as if a woman has never been in power in India. As Confused points out, Indira Gandhi held power in India for 17 years! And while we can disagree on her politics, it is safe to say that she was the person in charge. Why talk about the past? Any desi will tell you who holds the reins in this age of , as you put it, Manmohanomics. It is again a woman, Ms. Pande, the "severely dressed Sonia". So why has not the image of the Indian woman changed? Women have held important, decision- making posts in the government (past and present) and yet, what you profess the men in charge really fear, the "33% reservations in the legislature being filled with women who have found true self esteem" has not been realized.

So explain to me again, why would electing an incompetent woman as the President who holds no real power change that?

You, Ms. Pande, have done immense disservice to all feminists who are actively trying to try to fight for equal rights for women in India by saying that a woman should be elected based on her gender and not her qualification. You see, we feminists, have been trying hard to prove that we are as good as our male colleagues - fighting for promotions by proving that we can do a job as effectively as they can, trying to prove our hecklers wrong by showing that we are indeed as competent as the males. By writing this column, you have, in effect become a voice for "feminist baiters". Since what you are preaching is the very image that we feminist have been trying to change. You see, Ms. Pandey, a feminist like me would rather a person be given a job because they are the best candidate rather than it be given to any person, of any sex, of any religion, of any caste, of any state, heck of any country who lacks credentials.

So, if you are trying to tell me how Pratibha Patil becoming the President is the best thing to happen to Indian Sisterhood, try again!

And lastly, can you please explain what do you mean by these words,

Both the small screen and glossy periodicals are also virtually crackling with advice to the newly arrived power women about shedding the careless comfortable feminist dress sense and embracing power dressing and hanging out in power eating joints.

So you are saying the the power dressing women are not 'true' feminist? Or that the feminism movement which resulted in women wearing the so called "sensible, comfortable attire" only goes so far? Please do elaborate on what you think feminism as it relates to Indian woman is all about, for I think your article reeks of anti-feminism, the very thing you accuse the Patil dissenters as being.

Bequest

2007-07-10T10:06:00.000-04:00

You left me, sweet, two legacies, --
A legacy of love
A Heavenly Father would content,
Had He the offer of;

You left me boundaries of pain
Capacious as the sea,
Between eternity and time,
Your consciousness and me.

By one of my favorite writers, Emily Dickinson.

This is what all things boil down to, love and pain. And we still toil on in life, to find that next wave of love, knowing fully well that it will end and bring with it, pain.

Two sides of a coin? I think Love is a bittersweet pain.

Why bother? Bah,Humbug!

No, thank you!

2007-07-09T08:36:00.001-04:00

Nothing gets on my nerves more than a female who is a doormat and thankful for attention from a guy.. even in a song!

I ~~hate~~, passionately hate the song -"Aap ki nazron ne smajha pyar ke kabil mujhe." Lata sings this song composed by Madan Mohan and filmed over Dharampaji and Mala Sinha in the movie Anpadh. The lyrics explain why the song irks me so -

Aapki Nazaron Ne Samjha, Pyaar Ke Kabil Mujhe
Dil Kahe Dhadkan Thaher Ja, Mil Gayee Manzil Mujhe
Aapki Nazron Ne Samjha
Ji Hamen Manzoor Hai, Aapka Ye Faisla
Kah Rahi Hai Har Nazar, Banda Paravar Shukriya
Do Jahaan Ki Aaj Khushiyan Ho Gayee Haasil Mujhe
Aapki Nazron Ne Samjha ...
Aapki Manzil Hoon Main Meri Manzil Aap Hain
Kyon Main Toofaan Se Darun Mere Saahil Aap Hain
Koi Tufanon Se Kah De, Mil Gaya Sahil Mujhe
Aapki Nazron Ne Samjha ...
Pad Gai Dil Par Meri, Aapki Parchhaiyan
Har Taraf Bajane Lagin Saikadon Shahnaaiyaan
Hanske Apni Zindagi Mein, Kar Liya Shaamil Mujhe
Aapki Nazron Ne Samjha ...

Ugh! Hate it!
Why is this a romantic song? A women thankful that a guy fell in love with her. Thank the lord you "made me a part of your life".. Oooh, why should I be afraid when Mr. Prince Charming will vanquish all storms since he has deemed me worthy to stand by his side... Wimpy females drive me insane..

Sigh! Now even music drives me to rants..

Edited in -@ ~~Confused~~ The self proclaimed Lord *Khush?* (You did want to be mentioned on the blog :D) While I accept the charge of being a heretic, I object to be being called heartless! Yes, I am not a romantic for I dont believe in the concept of 'soul mate'. My belief of an ideal relationship can be summed in Gibran's words -

But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

Rain Should Consult The BMC...

2007-07-07T18:20:00.000-04:00

Most Mumbaikars are used to coping with the menace that monsoon brings. Trains shutting down, wading in water and general disruption of life. This time it was going to be different. After the July 25 26, 2005 rains, the government had taken 'steps' to ensure that the city would not come to a grinding halt after heavy rains.

Yet it happened, once again! And what did the CM say on returning from his business trip to Seattle?

“Our machinery has been preparing for the monsoon for the last one year, but this time round heavy showers were witnessed on spots other than those identified as chronic ones,”

[LINK]

So Mother Nature is to blame. She just rained in places where appropriate precautions had not been taken! He further went on to blame the media for the exaggerated reports about heavy rains. So blackouts in some areas of Mumbai, some odd 50 or so deaths, trains halted etc. is exaggeration?? What pray is the right attitude then?

Vilasrao Deshmukh has dreams of transforming Mumbai in the next decade. So far nothing he has done inspires my faith.
Pity, Mumbaikars as a lot more prone to put up with shit.. except when it comes to the 'Bhartiya Sanskriti' outrage. Why is the Internet cafe burning, Valentine card tearing crowd silent now?

On a unrelated note, with Taj getting the top slot in the new wonders - will people please stop forwarding me the "Vote for Taj", India's pride bull.. If you cared half as much as you do about whether Taj gets on this list, you would be giving donations to the environmentalists who are talking about restorations or asking the government to pass stricter environment laws..

Friday Audio

2007-07-06T09:29:00.000-04:00

Farida Khanum singing "Woh Mujhse Hue Hum Qalam."

Woh Mujhse..

If anyone knows the lyricist, please leave a comment.
Lyrics will also be much appreciated, thanks!

Musically challenged

2007-07-05T16:23:00.000-04:00

I took lots of musical lessons when I was in school. The lessons were a result of my mom's insistence to learn something creative. Sadly, she did not think of abstract art to be creative - I just could not get her to see that blotches of paint on a wall, sells.. But in reality, after despairing for a long time (and praying that soon her genes would kick in) over the lack of any likable or rather marketable qualities in her daughter, she put her foot down. I personally think that all the lessons and classes I took were just her creative thinking at best - get her out of the house on pretext of her learning something.. phew.. the house is quiet and is in no danger of being burnt, taken over by stray animals, strange insects or random trash from the yard (well, I was a very, what is the word politely used, oh yes, handful child). But I digress.

The first lesson in creative art, that I took was of dancing Kathak. The woman who was entrusted this enviable task of teaching me this art was one of Mom's innumerable friends who ran a dance school. The first week were of course spent learning the basic steps, the tatkaras and todas are an elemental part of the dance. And so she started with teaching me the "teen taal" - Dhaa Dhin Dhin Dhaa. The first lesson was learning the todas, clapping the beat out. She soon found out that my attention span lasted nanoseconds and I got bored enough to randomly stop clapping or worse yet change the time scale.. so while everybody kept time, *clap* 1 2 3 *clap*
I would, go *clap* 1 2 3 SKIP 1 2 3 *clap* and the follow it up with
*clap* 1 *clap* at an accelerated pace..
Of course, my musical genius was the envy of the other girls who complained so much that I was usually assigned the place next to the teacher, who held my hands and made me keep pace. So of course I did the rigid hands rule. Just let her get into the rhythm and then freeze up :D
After disrupting her class completely for two weeks, Mrs. Panchal requested my mother to find something else to occupy me and kindly suggested Mrs. Lodha's singing class.

So off I went to Lodha's singing academy. She gathered me to her ample bosom and pinched my cheeks and told me she was going to make sure I became a famous singer. So the first day, she made me listen to her singing various aalaps and had me dream about famous mehfils I would hold (Hey, I fell asleep while she was singing -It was the highest compliment I could pay her talent!!). The next day with a stern lecture from Ma to be good, I went inside the 'Academy' (which was actually Lodha's garage sans the Bajaj scooter or the Ambassador). Mrs. Lodha, in her vibrant pink Saree and red glossy lipstick, announced that she was going to judge my sur that day. So I sat opposite her and she played, "Sa" on the harmonium and said, "Sur milao, beta". Mindful that this was going to make or break my career, I cleared my throat and rendered a pitch perfect - SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA..
The only point was that it was a scale or two on the higher side, enough to send the Pomeranian, Monty, howling out of the room and making the baby next door wail. Knowing that such a talent would be exceptionally hard to mould, Mrs. Lodha told my Mom to put me into gymnastics. The Olympics and Yelena/ Nadia had sprouted a whole generation of gyms in the town we lived in. And I happily complied - my gawd- that was like my dream come true.

And my musical career would have ended, just like that. But for a drama skit in fourth grade that required me to play a guitar convincingly. Belonging to the "Method Acting" group of actors, I asked my Mom if I could enroll for Guitar lessons. She jumped with joy, praised the Lord about finally listening to her prayers of keeping me occupied and promptly started looking for teachers that taught on weekends (hmm.. that sounds suspiciously true of all classes I took as a hobby). But I like to think that she finally found the selling point, the one good thing to say about her daughter to the grooms party. And visions of future bridal/ groom party meetings went thus in her mind,

*Groom's mother - So your daughter does not like to cook, does not like to go to social functions, does not like people in general, is a smart ass, can not sing or dance but oh my , she plays the guitar!! Wow.. I hope she accepts my son. *

Well, I went to a catholic school then and one of the Sister offered to teach me. Sister Mary was this six feet tall, German women who had a thick accent and had lost her smile some time back. She also thought that a left handed guitarist is just asking to be told to shut up(Now you know why the Beatles really broke up) and hence, each Saturday we went through a routine - where I played the chords or attempted to with my right hand and she would come around, pinch my ears and switch the guitar around for me. So after a month of learning the chords, we moved on to songs. The first song I learnt.. Drum roll.. was "I have a dream".. now for those of you familiar with the song will understand why I could play it.. for those who don't - just think of a any song, slow it down to the absolutely slowest you can slow speech down and still speak legibly - that was the pace- aka any retard could play it- in fact learn the song and play it. People will think you are talented musician, I would however do it only at children's parties where you can keep playing the song over and over. In other instances, people may threaten to break the guitar over your head. Well, moving back to the story, when Sister Mary taught me the relatively faster beat of 4/4 and Cuckoo, I thought I was a musical genius. So I ambitiously asked her about other songs. She looked at me and said,

Child, let's be realistic. You can not hang on to a straight beat.
*hold your nose to get the German accent.. so it sounds like "Child, lez be realiztic. You kannt hang onn to a strat beaaat"*

Finally, I learnt my problem. All those traumatic experiences were suffered by me, for the simple reason that I was MUSICALLY CHALLENGED!

I broke the heart breaking news to my Mom, who promptly decided to enroll me into stitching classes (where we learnt that I was directionally challenged) and then to cooking classes (where we finally learnt that I was taste challenged) and finally as a list ditch effort, she put me to Grad school - where I am currently dragging along. She now hopes to use my doctorate to snag a guy. Little does she realize that I am also "technically challenged". But we will let her keep her delusions..for now..

Ps- This post was written some time back. Not back to full time blogging!!

Back...

2007-07-04T09:04:00.000-04:00

Ok, People! I am back to announce that I am neck deep in work and hence long posts are going to be put on hold.

I promise to put up short posts but be warned that there might be long gaps between updates. My sistahs are allowed to use the comment box to hold highly intellectual discourse about Himesh's popularity, his suuuuuurrrrrrrr, the plight of Indian cinema and JBJ, the difference between spamming and commenting, why Gems is refraining from writing, when TGFI will get back or about life in general. Arpz is welcome to cite grievances about whether or not I make up rules and disclaim her numerous victories. Others are welcome to chime in.

So, off I go to write the other important thing..........

Have fun!

Accused...

2007-07-04T08:58:00.001-04:00

Keith Olbermann, once again puts into words most eloquently what we all feel about the President commuting the Libby sentence. Wonderfully said, Go listen!

I accuse you, Mr. Bush, of lying this country into war.
I accuse you of fabricating in the minds of your own people, a false implied link between Saddam Hussein and 9/11.
I accuse you of firing the generals who told you that the plans for Iraq were disastrously insufficient.
I accuse you of causing in Iraq the needless deaths of 3,586 of our brothers and sons, and sisters and daughters, and friends and neighbors.
I accuse you of subverting the Constitution, not in some misguided but sincerely-motivated struggle to combat terrorists, but to stifle dissent.
I accuse you of fomenting fear among your own people, of creating the very terror you claim to have fought.
I accuse you of exploiting that unreasoning fear, the natural fear of your own people who just want to live their lives in peace, as a political tool to slander your critics and libel your opponents.
I accuse you of handing part of this Republic over to a Vice President who is without conscience, and letting him run roughshod over it.
And I accuse you now, Mr. Bush, of giving, through that Vice President, carte blanche to Mr. Libby, to help defame Ambassador Joseph Wilson by any means necessary, to lie to Grand Juries and Special Counsel and before a court, in order to protect the mechanisms and particulars of that defamation, with your guarantee that Libby would never see prison, and, in so doing, as Ambassador Wilson himself phrased it here last night, of becoming an accessory to the obstruction of justice.

Bloggie talks...

2007-07-02T08:40:00.000-04:00

Bloggie: Hi, Everyone. I am taking charge of this space. This girl has been saying all sorts of things and making me blush, cringe and run for mercy most of the time.

Instead of working diligently on her thesis or at the bench, she has been spending time here, using me for her own nefarious means. So I have kicked her off. From now on, it will be me talking. I have a lot to say but I am the silent, brooding types and just don't like talking to strangers.

So why don't you introduce yourselves till I figure out what I want to talk about? And you anony-mices that just prowl through here without saying HI.. please leave a note!
And yes, topics can be suggested too. Unlike the girl, I am at a loss for words, most of the time.

And I'll be back..

Psst- don't let that girl take over. I have many insider secrets about her to tell you..

Edited in - Secrets will be outed! I will answer all the questions you ask. So go ahead, introduce yourselves and ask whatever you want to know. I will not disappoint you as the girl did before.

Friday Audio

2007-06-29T08:07:00.000-04:00

Born A Libran's request for Friday Audio was AR Rehman. I was in a mood for a peppy number - so picked one of my favorite compositions by him, Mangta hai kya bolo.

Movie - Rangeela. Lyricist- Mehboob. Singers - Rahman A R and Shweta Shetty

rangeela - MANGTA HAI KYA

Hello

2007-06-28T10:41:00.000-04:00

Armed with a Popcorn bucket I watched "The Truth about Cats and Dogs." A delightfully funny though cliched in some parts the film was just the thing I needed. Here is a movie that shows a 7 hour conversation between the hero and the girl, that ends up in sex - yep, good old over the phone sex. I am always intrigued by the concept of talking dirty on the phone. I don't mean the $1.99 calls to some fat broad sitting in a dirty room in ugly underwear, stuffing herself with Cheetos while she answers, "Oh! Baby.. ". I mean dirty talk between two normal people in a relationship.

See, I can flirt with the best of them - innocent or heavy flirting, I am a pro at either one. The one thing that I can not do is indulge in dirty talk over the phone - can do it online or in person but not over the phone. It is as if hand me the phone and my imagination dries up.
"So what are you wearing," he drawls.
I look at the phone quizzically and answer, "clothes? Just like I normally do."
"So are you wearing the red PJs?" he purrs.
"Its freaking 90 F and those PJ are flannel.. are you nuts?"
And I hear the distinct "thump. thump" of his head hitting the wall/ the head board.. I can not tell the difference.

I can send sexy text messages and tease him on chat but I pick up the phone and all I utter are things about my day, politics, books or movies. So I had watched the movie with the hope that I could use some lines, also dug up some romance novels to pick cues. I even asked my girlfriend what to do. "Talk to him as if he is there, y'know, and you are doing it," was her wise reply. Oh, Ok. I said. So I started writing down words. She peeked over my shoulder and said - "not commands, you moron.. it has to be sensual. Make it like a soft porn novel. You have to build the image in your head". Oh, Ok.. But I told her what if I get so turned on by what he is saying that I cant reply? She rolled her eyes at me and said he is used to living in your universe .. she made it out to be a snide remark but I cant pin point why self satisfaction is so wrong :P
After the logistics of the call were thrashed out with the girl friend, hand free set, candles lit, tissues etc, I decided to just do it..

So one fine night, armed (written on cheat notes) with what to say, I wore my lace trimmed night gown and picked up the phone.
Hello, he answered.
Hey, what are you doing? I said.
Studying he said.
Well I am laying here in bed in my nightgown, I added with a sultry voice.
"Are you sick? You sound weird."
"Must be.. for I have this fluttery feeling in my stomach."
"I told you to stop eating at that damn Chinese place."
"They closed the palce down - health hazard"
"I told you that place sucked."
"Oh but the egg rolls were so yummy."
"Well, of course. And the eminent Salmonella threat makes it all the more exciting."
"Speaking of eminent threats, did I tell you about this book on Ebola I am reading now?"
...... Half an later realize that the candle has flickered out (Note to self, buy big ass candles to burn) and make a serious effort to get the conversations back on track again..Err.. what do my notes say.. oh right..
" So , as I was telling you I am just lying here in my skimpy gown and I am so hot.."
"Turn the AC on, you cheapo"
"But then I get cold in the middle of the night."
"Then turn it off."
"But then I wake up. Y'know how difficult it is for me to fall back asleep."
"God give me strength. and something about obstinate, argumentative females"..I can't catch soft whispers on my hands-free set..
Ok. need to go for the direct approach. Straight to bizness..
"May be I should just take the gown off" *that should get the message through to him*
"Yeah, Ok. What ever works."
"I mean the sheets are cool and I can just be here, au naturale.."
"Sounds good. "
"You know I have the Egyptian sheets on that you like so much."
"Hmm."
"You always said I looked good on those."
"Yes,dear. You do."
"So you think I should do it?"
"Yeah, what ever, Love."
"God damn it. I am trying to flirt with you! What is your problem?"
"I have developed a headache,dear!"

That's it. I hung up. We now write each other emails. I invested in Internet at home, so we chat. And the relationship over couple hundred miles is chugging along. But phone is now officially used only for normal conversations. Just like food is only for eating (that will be a follow up story)..

What are the odds?

2007-06-27T08:17:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, Orkut told me my fortune for the day:

You are broad minded and socially active.

The cookie at the Thai place later on in the day said the same thing!

What are the odds, huh? I think the Universe is trying to tell me something - I am just missing the point.

As seems to be the case with the last post. Think of it as a much awaited Bollywood movie - the trailer raised your hopes, but then it was a lame movie :D

Random Tag

2007-06-26T18:34:00.000-04:00

Winner of the contest is Lalit (wokay, the judge really preferred Confused's version - but I told him that I would put a reciprocal post about his activities.. so Lalit seems a safe bet :P)!! Shek, you came a close second - in fact if it were up to me I would have done the grad student chappal thing. What the heck -I will do it anyhow :D

So Lalit's version of the random facts about me - a tag courtesy of Patrix.

Choose 8 friends (Born a Libran: All the 8 friends have to be blogging at the blogs from the "I prowl through" section) and assign each one a random number. Do this before proceeding any further.

1. Madhuli.
2. Sonya.
3. Lalit.
4. Big Sky aka S.
5. Confused.
6. Neihal.
7. Aarti.
8. Born A Libran.

8 questions
Answers need to be descriptive. (Clause dissolved)

1) Who would u want to kiss?
Errr... any male that volunteers on that list? Girls, I am sorry but if they really can not kiss (and believe me I have read some of their exploits- so it is a distinct possibility), I will look your way.
*Oh Btw, one of them has already been a recipient - I don't kiss and tell :D You can guess :P

2) Who is your least fav amongst the 8?
Right now, I will say Lalit. For he is laughing his ass off for making me write this. *Dekh loongi tujhe bhi*
Honestly, there is none. I mean I don't know half of them personally anyway!

3) Whom would u want to meet in real life?
Anyone who offers to buy me a drink and cook me some good food. Heck I already promised a kiss :D So, what are you waiting for!!
Someone has been promising to drop by for some time now. I just am heart broken that he fails to keep his promise :D

4) If u had to choose between 5 and 3, who would it be?
For what? I will go with #5. I am still mad at Lalit. And Confused needs a counselling session - to much interest in my sex life :D

5) 1,3,5 & 7 are at one party n 2, 4, 6 & 8 at another. Where would u go?
Party 1 - Anywhere where Madhuli is, I know I can safely find a corner to hide and still get the numbers of the guys I like. This girl has had my back for past couple of decades :D
And then I get to use my wiles on the two of the males? Damn I need to reorder that list :D

6) If u had to spend all your life with one out of the 8 who would it be?
Only one of them has proposed to me... So I guess I will start with him. On hind sight, Big Sky is a much safer bet! He has the best thing going in the bunch.. Hmmm.

7) Would u rather go on a holiday with 2 or 4?
Big Sky would be it. Sonya, my sistah, I know you understand :D So S, next vacation in Tahiti ;)

8) A few words about any one of the 8.
Here's a tip on all of them
1. Madhuli. - She knows more about me than the rest of the list put together :D
2. Sonya - She is likely to guess most accurately my response to anything.
3. Lalit. - He is most likely to hear any news first from me.
4. Big Sky aka S. - He is the only person who knows the other me :D
5. Confused. - He definitely will want to know more for I have not revealed a juicy secret yet.
6. Neihal. - She would definitely like to know more about my muzik collection.
7. Aarti. - She would like to know when I am handing over the title crown to her.
8. Born A Libran. - He would just like me to talk more at SC :D

Since people had been tagged at the earlier version, I let them be. But if you feel like doing this post, leave a comment :D
* added in

Disclaimer - Sorry not to dish out more :D

Contest..

2007-06-26T10:21:00.000-04:00

Patrix tagged me to write 8 Random facts about me. *No need to groan* I have told all that I could about me. And since I am going to be busy (no, not spamming errr commenting) with actual work, I thought I would open this up as a challenge.
Here's the rules -
1. Come up with an innovative way for me to do the tag - it could be 8 questions, 8 lies *that I tell* (1), 8 quirks or anything that has me spewing 8 things.
2.You will be credited.
3. The more outrageous the better.
4. Winner gets a prize. *It will be announced shortly!!*

Ps. A non biased judge has been appointed.
And p.ps. Everyone who reads this please drop a comment :D
I will personally come and hound you for not coming up with ideas :D

1. Already suggested - Born a Libran : 8 lies that they tell you.
Kaushik - Pick 8 random numbers and what they mean to you.

Cook me a date..

2007-06-25T14:47:00.000-04:00

I have to confess, I find nothing more sexier than me sipping a nice cool beer and watching a man slaving over the stove. I mean it abso-freaking -lutely turns me on. In fact, I lurve to see a man cook so much that the only TV show I watch (apart from msnbc) is Top Chef. All those men cooking all those elaborate meals is like manna to me :D

Where am I going with this? Well, sometime back I had mentioned this odd fact to a guy I know. I never thought more about it - it was something I said in passing and was not meant for him to be taken as a hint or as a strategy. But it seems he did. So one day last winter I get a call. It was the Xmas break, I was bored and so I said yes to the date. The day arrived and I made my way to his house. The setting was just perfect. He lead me to the kitchen, where a red wine bottle was opened and some nibbling set (I have a thing for big, roomy kitchens). After the initial mundane conversations was over, he turned to cook our meal. I offered to help. "No, you sit. I have it under control, said he." Oh, good, I thought as I sipped the wine.

My first clue that he really did not know what he was doing should have come from the fact that he pondered over how to start the oven. But he did turn the oven on and put in a rack of lamb, seasoned and all. For dessert, we will have peach flambe. And I salivated over the recipe and the man's ability to flambe. Let's sit in the living room while this thing cooks, he said as he lead the way.

We had an enjoyable time talking about this and that, when I realized that it was over an hour since the rack was in the oven (ideal cooking time for a medium rare piece would have been like 30 minutes in this case :D). So he pulled it out of the oven and carved it up and served it up nicely. We sat at the beautifully set table with pretty flowers and the nicely served plates with the meat and some veggies. Well, the down side of the nice chit chat was that the meat was a chewy - kind of like leather that I valiantly tried swallowing. It was mission impossible and I ended up drinking more wine and made a fine show of pushing the meat all over the plate. Realizing the date was sinking like Titanic, he moved on quickly to the flambe - he got the two dessert plates with pre-cooked peaches out, set it on the table and proceeded to set it on fire. The problem was the amount of alcohol added (he had the peaches swimming in it) - and as soon as the light met the dish, it made a big whoosh and had him jumping two feet in the air and set the alarm on top of the table off...

He put a big towel on top of the flames, which caught fire. So he panicked and started screaming - on fire!! While he was dealing with trying to put off the flames on the towel, by stomping on them,I was busy trying to prevent the local fire station from arriving at the house. So I climbed atop the kitchen table and jumped up and down, trying to stick wet tissue towels over the alarm, so that it would stop and busy praying that the table would not break. After an eternity (5 minutes or so) we had things under control. Looking at each other across a table with spilled wine, dry rack of lamb, wet papers, a smoky air, soot all over his pants - we burst out laughing.

As we cleaned up, he confessed to having a friend help him with the cooking (Sadly a girl, yeah I asked) and was sorry that it turned disastrous. So I went back home with an empty stomach and the secure knowledge that a sturdy table can bear my weight.

Oh yes, we did go out again - to a Japanese restaurant, where we sat at the Hibachi grill and watched a professional man cook. That works for me.

And PS- for all guys whom I would date - the kitchen can be a great place for seduction but learn how to cook first ok.. I dont think I want to jump on a table to put an alarm off again :D

Question.

2007-06-24T11:54:00.000-04:00

Why are people uncomfortable with the concept of Atheism? Why is it that when I say I am an Atheist, the response usually is
- Oh, You are not. You are just in denial.
- When you are in dire need, you will accept him.
- You are too innocent to understand the ways of the world.
- You are just being fashionable.
- You have not studied scriptures. He exists.
- You will go to hell.

Why can't my stance be a rational thought out position? To me, his existence is the most illogical, irrational thing. I don't accept it.
Why do people have to then make me believe the fallacy of my position?
What is so great about accepting a God?

* Arose out of an early Sunday morning conversation with my 'God is great' neighbour.

Conversations..

2007-06-23T14:37:00.000-04:00

Me: "Are you sure?"
H: "Yes, I have seen the pictures"
Me:"But this looks complicated. I am not sure, I can do it."
H: "You will be just fine."
Me:"I don't think that will fit"
H: "It is designed to."
Me: "But.."
H: "Here hold it. See it will go in smoothly in there."
Me: "I think you will have to push it in.Slowly. Do it slowly."
H: "Let me get on my knees. I think it will be easier then."
Me: "Ok. Push now."
H: "Is it in?"
Me: "Is it all the way in? I don't think so."
* edited in
Me: "May be you should slide it in and out, till it gets all the way there. I told you it won't fit!"
H: "Ok. A couple more pushes.."
grunting sounds.
Yes!!
H: "There. Done."
Me: "That's it?"
H: "What did you expect?"
Me:"Just that you know.."
H: "You women tend to complicate everything. This is as good as it gets."

He stands back and looks at the assembled Ikea computer table fondly.

In Memorium

2007-06-22T09:59:00.001-04:00

My spirit died the other day, when you decided not to live anymore.
Not a day goes by when I don't remember you.
When I think about how life could have been had you been here.
I still leave the light on for you.
But I know I will never hear your voice. or see you smile. or see the wonder in your eyes.
So my spirit lays dead.
For somethings in life can never live when innocence dies.

Friday Audio

2007-06-21T15:54:00.001-04:00

Here's Noor Jehan singing 'Mujse pehlisi mohabbat mere mehboob na mang' Lyricist : Faiz Ahmed Faiz.

Mujhse Pehli Si Mohabbat

Keeping up the tradition of posting the audio a day early :D

The lyrics:

Mujhse pehli si mohabbat mere mehboob na mang

Maine samajhaa thaa ke tu hai to darakhshaan hai hayaat
Tera gam hai to gam-e-dahar kaa jhagadaa kyaa hai
Teri surat se hai aalam mein bahaaron ko sabaat
Teri aankhon ke sivaa duniyaa men rakhaa kyaa hai
Tu jo mil jaae to taqadir niguun ho jaae
Yun na tha, maine faqat chaahaa tha yuun ho jaae

Anginat sadiyon ke taarik bahimaanaa talism
Reshm-o-atalas-o-kamakhwaab mein bunawaae hue
Jaa-ba-jaa bikate hue kuuchaa-o-baazaar mein jism
Khaak men lithre hue khoon men nahalaae hue
Laut jaatii hai udhar ko bhi nazar kyaa kije
Ab bhi dilakash hai tera husn, magar kyaa kije
Aur bhi duKh hain zamaane men mohabbat ke sivaa
Raahaten aur bhi hain vasl ki raahat ke sivaa

Truly a beautiful ghazal. And Noor Jehan's voice takes it to the next level.

Edited in - Here's a page with the song and meanining of the urdu words. As I said before, it is very difficult to do a literal translation. Thanks to Red soul.

No Sex Toys For MP!

2007-06-20T20:02:00.000-04:00

Anil Dave, State BJP Vice-President, explains the Madhya Pradesh's government ban on vibrating condom thusly,

"Why only in Madhya Pradesh, in entire literate society or developed society, one should make sure that (one) makes minimum interference into natural activities."

Heh.
Now, no more foreplay too! Minimal Interference, remember!

Loved the way IBN plugs the product :D

Marathi manus, Rajni and Records..

2007-06-20T16:30:00.001-04:00

For all those wondering why this blog is neglected, I am busy at the Lord Of Blogosphere's comment space.
He asked Tamilians to explain the Rajni phenomenon. We proved that Rajni is liked because he is a Marathi manus and Marathi manus rocks. Now the comment space is at 917 comments- and the race for 1000 is on!

Go and claim the 1000 comment - a record on any desi site for yourself. Join the fun.

Luck, Finally

2007-06-19T19:06:00.000-04:00

After complaining about the dearth of men in this hick town of mine, looks like I am going to land on the treasure trove..

Finally, some good luck coming my way. Woo hoo! Now I have motivation to tackle the burden that is my thesis :D

Map from National Geographic from here

Rushdie Knighted, Islam Blighted?

2007-06-19T10:27:00.000-04:00

WTF moment of the day.

"This is an occasion for the 1.5 billion Muslims to look at the seriousness of this decision," Mohammed Ijaz ul-Haq, religious affairs minister, told the Pakistani parliament in Islamabad. "The west is accusing Muslims of extremism and terrorism. If someone exploded a bomb on his body he would be right to do so unless the British government apologises and withdraws the 'sir' title." Link.

Poor baby.. Did somebody hurt your feelings? Just go and bomb them!

Muslim Labour peer Lord Ahmed said "Actually I was appalled to hear that Salman Rushdie had been given knighthood, particularly when this man has been very divisive. This man - as you can see - not only provoked violence around the world because of his writings, but there were many people that were killed around the world and honouring the man who has blood on his hands, sort of because of what he did, honouring him I think is going a bit too far." Link.

Heh. I know the feeling. Each time I write FSM likes Martini and not beer, the whole Pastafarian world goes crazy. It starts lynching, burning and what not. All my fault. The people who react to the words are simply not to blame!

Take a deep breath people. He is knighted for his literary services. And he deserves it. So stuff it.

Questions

2007-06-18T09:26:00.000-04:00

Is it wrong to give a kid a job and let him earn money to feed himself or his family?
When he should be in school getting an education.

----------------------------------------------------------------
Is it wrong for a young girl of 16 to get married so that she escapes the slums?
When she should be allowed to remain a girl.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Is it wrong to spend hundreds of rupees pacifying gawd knows what Gods or planets?
When you could easily support a girl's education or feed a family.

---------------------------------------------------------------
Is it wrong to ignore the beggar sitting at the corner, looking pathetic and starved, asking you for a dollar?
When he would just use that money to get drunk.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Is it wrong for a poor woman to sell her body when she is starving?
When the money she gets feeds her and her family.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Is it wrong for a couple to stick together in an unhappy marriage for their family/kids?
When they are giving up a chance at life itself.

-----------------------------------------------------------------
Is it wrong for a child to live his parent's dreams?
When he is giving up his own.

-----------------------------------------------------------------
I am amazed by people who have staunch moralistic views. I, for one, can not find answers to any of these situations - each side is right and each side is wrong.

To Dad

2007-06-17T13:14:00.000-04:00

I miss

- your hugs.

-the way you ruffled my hair affectionately each morning.

- your singing "Volare" and telling Dean Martin Jokes.

- your playing Eddie Calvert early Saturday morning.

- our passionate discussion about Indian politics.

- our little chats about life on our short rides together.

- your staying awake late to ensure I came back home safely.

- you always bringing home my favorite snack.

- the way you made me read Marathi/Hindi newspapers before I read the English :)

- the way you make fun of me slipping back and forth between languages.

- the way you indulged my reading habit.

- the way you taught me to understand business and people who run them.

- the glares and the "touch her and I will kill you" looks you gave to each guy who came near me.

- the pride in your eyes.

- the love so evident in your voice.

- the way you dropped a kiss on my forehead every night.

- the way you wanted to put me in a bubble wrap and safe from the world.

- the way you let me go so that I could learn to live again.

I miss you!

Southpark..

2007-06-15T16:50:00.000-04:00

Shek tagged me to do my very own Southpark character. This very nifty fan has made it possible to design your own character and a southpark fan like me could not resist..

And all Southpark fans are tagged, go get your own here.

Phone- tic questions

2007-06-15T13:44:00.001-04:00

- why do people come to "exercise' at the arboretum but talk on their phone all the time?
- why do desi students talk on their phone outside their home?
- why do all students turn their cell phones on and talk while they walk to the next class or where ever?
- why do people think it is rude if you don't pick up your phone?
- why do you want to know what model I carry?
- why does a phone also have to have a camera, a mp3 player and an Internet explorer?
- why do I have to give my number to each desi that asks for it?
- why do people leave their phone on ringer at seminars/movie theatre?
- why do you come to a party and then spend the entire time talking on your phone?
- how can a person talk for hours together on the phone?
- what does a person talk for hours together on the phone?

Friday Audio

2007-06-14T18:03:00.000-04:00

Lalit sent me this track sometime back and I lost track of it. Here's his short intro to the track:

"This track is from the album Shri Durga (1999), best described as 'Traditional ragas meet DJ Science'. Global alchemist Cheb i Sabbah collaborates with the masters of Hindustani Classical music, such as Ustad Salamat Ali Khan, K Sridhar, Ustad Sultan Khan, Mala Ganguly, and Bill Laswell, to create a new marriage of ancient and modern. This track is based on Raag Mishra Darbari. To To samples more of his music visit here.
Just in case the track sounds familiar to some song, all due credit should be given to Mr Anand Raj Anand ."

Thanks Lalit for the track and all the Lalitpedia is always helpful :P

Kese Kese.mp3

Don't know why..

2007-06-14T17:28:00.000-04:00

Oh,that voice! What else do I need to say.. N'joy.

Don't Know Why

Norah Jones singing Don't know why.
DP- Had problems with your request. Will put it up next week :)

We are to blame..

2007-06-14T08:27:00.000-04:00

The wedding is a success. Happy bride and groom stand on the stage accepting the warm greetings of the numerous people attending the wedding.
Three months later, the bride is pregnant.
Six months later, the groom falls sick.
The arrival of the baby coincides with the mother's diagnosis.
All three are HIV+.
The bride nurses the husband till his death.
Then, she is thrown out of the house with her kid.
Her family refuse to take her in.
She finds that no hospital is willing to take her in.

The tragedy of the story is
The groom knew he was HIV+ when he married, yet he married anyway.
His family knew and they forced him to marry.
The doctor knew but he could not tell the girls family.
The bride's family never thought to ask about a blood test.

But who is really to blame?
Its you and me - the society at large. We are all guilty. We allowed this crime, a homicide really, to happen. Till we change our perception of HIV victims, we will force them to pretend everything is normal and we will drive an innocent into becoming a statistic. We have to make some changes, NOW!

Barbs Across The Wire

2007-06-13T08:44:00.001-04:00

My niece, M: *Giggling uncontrollably* Is it morning or night there?
Me: Morning,beta.
Niece: It's night here! *Laughing* And I am going to sleep. You have to work.. More laughter follows.
Me: Sigh!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ma: Tell M to study.
Me: Put her on the phone. After M picks up, I tell her to study.
M: But I don't need education.
Me: Everyone needs one. If you want to succeed, you have to do well at school.
M: I am going to be a supermodel - I don't need a degree for that.
Me: Sigh!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

M: Hello, Sakshi.
Bhai: Sakshi what? M call her Bua/Aatya.
M: She is a friend.
Bhai: She is older than you!
M: But she still goes to school.
Me: Sigh!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

On a Sunday,
Me: Hey Pillu mau, what are you up to?
M: I am listening to songs.
Me: Oh! What songs?
M: From the movie, xyz.
Me: Are they good?
M: *Incredulity very evident in her voice* You have not heard this? It is a chart buster. And so and so dances in it. You don't know this song - hums a tune.
Me: No.
M: What do you do then in your free time?
Me: Sigh!
------------------------------------------------------------------------

M: Are you working.
Me: Yes, beta. It's morning here. I am at work.
M: I am going to do nothing but laze around the house, read books, eat food cooked by Grandma and watch movies. Just wanted to let you know.
Me: Sigh!
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Enough about me!!

2007-06-12T15:47:00.000-04:00

Arpz tagged me to do eight weird things about me. And Anshul tagged me to do 10 facts/habits about me. I am just going to group them together and put out a random assorted things you should know about me -
And yes, you shall be subject to a quiz!

1. I hate phone conversations. Just do. If I call you or talk with you on the phone, you should thank the FSM. I am known to call people up, ask a question and after getting the reply- hang up :) No small talk. After a call with my parents (the longest conversations I have), I am known to hole up in my room or office and not talk with anyone for hours on end.

2. I am not afraid of dying. Or Aging. Death is inevitable. If I die tomorrow, I will die happy - content with my life. And about aging, most people who have known me since I was a kid will attest that I was born old. I am just hitting the age I was meant to be :)

3. I don't do emotions well. I am uncomfortable showing love, hate, anger, pity or sympathy to anyone. It's not that I don't feel it. I have to process things before I can project them. So if I said thank you after you said, "I love you", please just give me day to take stock of my feelings and reply :)

4. I don't do drugs for fear of losing control. I drink but I hate getting drunk. A buzz is good but nothing beyond that. The reason, I hate losing control :)

5. I have a high pain thresh hold level. But I hate pain and would want the drugs then. I have sustained bone fractures and bore the pain for more than 16 hours on at least a couple occasions :) But once the doctor started fixing it, I yelled "Bleedy Murder, Knock me out!"

6. I can do without talking to another human being for hours on end. I have sat through parties/gatherings with a book in hand, burrowed in a corner reading and totally oblivious to the noise and people around me. I can do this without the book, too.

7. I always answer nothing - when asked what's new? What are you up to? I have no talent for small talk. And I would rather people come directly to the point. Exception - Don't ask me - when I am getting done? Graduating? moving? And more importantly - going home! Just don't...

8. I am happy 99.99% of time. The other 0.01% I swing between being pissed off and sad. For the most part I can't hold on to negative feelings. BTW- just because I am happy does not mean I am cheer leader for LIFE! I don't do - aren't you glad to be alive and isn't life peachy keen remarks. Life sucks. You can take that with a smile or a frown. I do it with a smile.

9. I talk to myself. I also do alternate conversation in my head. So if you see me smirk - I thought something funny.

10. I have A.D.D. So most of the time, you are talking - I ain't listening. So be sure to say certain cue words to reel my attention back in :P

Now to spread this joy: I tag
QSG
Neihal
Aarti
Kaushik
Shek
HAN and Lalit -- who are doubly tagged now. Both by Arpz and me! Get to it all of you!

Chirp..

2007-06-12T10:35:00.000-04:00

Hell hath no fury and all that ..

A female house sparrow (Passer domesticus) will often seek out the nest of another female that her partner has also mated with. She, then, kills the first female's young, to remove the competition and ensure that the male spends as much time as possible helping to raise her chicks.

You go, girl.. Nothing like a lil murder that makes the male toe the line :P

And you thought they were such harmless things :)

Educated and Wedded

2007-06-11T16:02:00.000-04:00

A whole new spin to the "educated" bride. WTF moment ensues when one reads this..

Manju Sanskar Kendra in Bhopal teaches woman how to be dutiful wives.

It offers a three-month course that stresses on the importance of "Indian
culture" and the woman adjusting to her new family after marriage.
While students spend the first month learning Sikh and Hindu scriptures, the second month has lessons in naturopathy and the third is entirely dedicated to domestic life.
"We teach women how to serve their husbands and win laurels and how to
behave with in-laws. We also tell them to be tolerant while adjusting to their
new home," Hemnani (the founder and director) said.

While a part of me is laughing hysterically at this neanderthal attitude being preached, the other part is wondering whether a submissive female is all that it takes to have a marriage that works? How about wanting a marriage that makes you happy? Or is that a mutually exclusive concept?

And as Lalit pointed out, their training is incomplete. Sadly neglected in one important area! Any volunteers to start the next KS school?

Conversation

2007-06-11T10:25:00.000-04:00

He: You should take this relationship seriously.
She: Why?
He: You never know. Something may work out between the two of you. You never give it a chance.
She: I believe all relationships are transient. Why should I hope for more? Only heartbreak lies that way.
He: There you go. Taking the negative stand. Not all things fail. You just back out of things before letting them play the entire hand. It's all about control with you. You want to end things before you get hurt.
She: Is that wrong? I have never seen things work out.
He: But if you get more involved, they can. That is what I am trying to tell you.
She: Yeah, right! I have seen relationships wither slowly away. Then you are trapped in the rotting carcass of what once was a beautiful thing.So I am superficial. I walk out before things get messy. I know you say that I walk out to avoid getting hurt, well I believe that self preservation is a wonderful thing.
Relationships are like temporary shelters from storms. Transient needs fulfilled by fleeting beings in my life. We expect too much of people,I think. We use people and relationships to make our life seem to be more substantial than it really is. I don't think we need lasting relationships. Look back at your childhood. Your best friend, the one you exchanged best friends forever vows with? That person is not even a significant part of your life anymore. You now have a new friend who takes the old person place. All of life is like that- a constantly woven matrix, new threads and new design ever evolving.
He: Yes, but you still need to have a person who ties the broken threads, who mends the torn fabric! We need people, girl.
She: Yes, but there is always somebody there to take the place of someone before. So how do you know whom to trust to make that person an integral part of your life?
He: You don't. You take the chance. Sometimes, that leap of faith lands you into sure hands. Sometimes, you get burnt.
She: Hah! I think the latter is more true. People just look after their own means.
He: But you have to give things a chance.
She: Easy to say. But so difficult to do.
He: And when has life been easy? But you will never know until you try.
She: I just take a day at a time. Sometimes I think I was born to be a nomad- no ties, no wishes, no wants.
He: But life is nothing if you don't yearn for more.
She: And life is so much more beautiful, if you don't yearn but just live in the moment.

Both look at each other and nurse their drink. A battle they have fought so many times. And never with a solution. Each person looks at life through their prejudiced eyes. Each makes his own judgement about life. Each is right. And each person is wrong.

Ehsaas

2007-06-08T10:25:00.000-04:00

As she shuts of the alarm and snuggles back to the warmth of the blanket, a smile covers Riya's face. She reaches out a hand to reach for that twig of Mogra that she would find on the pillow next to her. He did it every day. Walking out in the gardens with a coffee cup in his hand, to pick a twig that had her favorite flower in it. He would then leave it on the pillow, for her to wake up to the sweet fragrance. The rest of the day she would look at the flower and dream of the night she would spend with him.

Her hand fumbled over the pillow, desperately trying to find the flower. As her arm grasped it, she smiled and closed her eyes and gently cradled the flower to her face. She should ask him to stop going outside in this cold. Yes, she would talk to him today. No reason for him to catch a cold. She knew he would refuse, saying that it was something he loved doing. She thought about how he secretly liked her fussing over him. And made a note to nag him a little about this.

When another incessant peel of the alarm went off, Riya decided it was time to get out of the bed. There was a lot to do. As she woke up, her eyes fell on her slippers. Strange, she thought. And then looked down - that is really odd, she muttered.

Her slippers and night rail were streaked with the mud, from the rain yesterday. And then her eyes fell on his portrait, hanging on the wall with a garland.. And she felt as if she was in a nightmare- not really awake. And wished that she could go back to that moment, when she found the twig..

The alternate end

Riya woke up. Drew in gasping breath. And looked at the wall. Shook her head at what she saw. Then smiled at her foolishness. Turned her head to see the outline of her hubby, snoring blissfully. Riya looked fondly at him and then closed her eyes, gently rubbing the enormous swell of her belly. She mentally vowed never to eat pickles at night, no matter what the baby said. Nightmares like that she would do without.
"Are you OK?", came the sleepy rumble. And she turned to smile into that beloved face, "Things can not be better."

I have fiddled with ending and twisted it in so many ways. You can depending on what your mood is, make it into a suspense, a love story or a tragedy. Try it :)

Friday Audio

2007-06-07T16:35:00.000-04:00

This happens to be one of my favorite songs. You young'uns have not heard the original :) Here's Chandni Raatein sung by Noor Jehan. Movie: Dupatta (1955). Music Director: Feroze Nizami.

NOOR JAHAN-Chandni Raatein

And here's the Bally Sagoo remix,from the album Partners in Rhyme and sung by Shamsa Kanwal.

CHANDNI RAATEIN

Friday Audio

2007-06-07T16:21:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite group, Red Hot Chili Peppers singing Californication.

Californication

I know not Ozzy but I hope you enjoy this one, Shek :)

Thank you!

2007-06-06T16:49:00.000-04:00

Boss:*On a Friday Evening* I want you to give me the labeling results, first thing Monday morning.
Me: *Shit. There goes my weekend* Sure thing boss..

Me: *Monday Morning* Here are the results.
Boss: Why don't you just present them at the meeting?
Me: The meeting is on Thursday.
Boss: Yeah, I know.
Me: *#$@$$$

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Me: I think if we do these crosses, we might be able to show this aspect of the model.
Boss: What? You really think so? I thought you would know better.

Boss: *Next lab meeting* You know, we should try the cross with those two. You can really show this XYZ thing, then.
*Looks at me* You should have thought that!
Me: *#$@$$$
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boss: Type the paper - results section up. We need to get it out asap!
Me: *three weeks later* What do you think of the paper?
Boss: Oh! I did not have a chance to look at it. Will do it next month.
Me: *#$@$$$
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me: Boss, I need to go home this winter.
Boss: Yeah, take the week before Xmas off.
Me: That is just two weeks.
Boss: And? What do you have to do at home? Travel needs say 4 days and spend the other 10 at home. What else do you need?
Me: *#$@$$$

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Me: *Opening official mail* Yippee! I got the Fellowship. Fine print says Boss recommended me highly.

Me: *Opening email* Yippee! I got the job. Future employer says Boss's recommendation was one of the best praises for a graduate student.
----------------------------------------------------------
I have cussed at him (mentally of course). But apart from all the bitching, my Boss has been an excellent mentor. Praise does not escape his lips regularly - in fact I can count the number of times he has openly praised me. But I know that when it counts, he does not hold back.

He has pushed me to try better - at education, teaching, lab work, mentoring or even being just a graduate student. He expected me to be the best and his expectations made me strive to achieve that. I won accolades for being a good teacher, a good student or mentor - but he drove me to get there.

I was a novice, with no knowledge of molecular biology when I started. He pushed me into reading and presenting papers, talking science and taking me to conferences when I had nothing to show. The end result was that I learnt- by watching, talking and exchanging ideas with other successful people. At the end of my graduate school, my expertise is sought out. I am not saying this as self praise- but rather an acknowledgement of my Boss's success. This is where he wanted me to be.

I was trained not only to be a geneticist or a biochemist but also to understand the financing aspect of lab management - how to stock, where to buy, when to buy, how to cut costs, where to cut costs, etc. After all these years, I can manage a lab economically. He taught me how to train people, how to delegate duties, how to gauge strength and weakness in your team, how to nurture ideas and when to cut slack and when to raise the whip. He trained me to be a future mentor.

I learnt work ethic from him. Oh! I have bitched about being in the lab 24/7 at the early time points. But I also know that when the going was crucial, my boss was also spending crazy hours with me. He taught me to lead by example. And to always put science first. Sometimes it was hard on family and friends. But the results reaped are worth it.

I say it here because all this and more can not be put in my acknowledgment section. But I do want him to know that I am glad that I picked his lab - despite being warned by all fellow students that he is a hard ass :) He was an exceedingly demanding task master but he has prepared me for almost any battle in life - he was taught me how to rely on my intelligence and think a problem through, devising alternative strategies and working out at least 2/3 at a time :)

So, all I have to say is this - Thank you. Simply Thank you for everything.

Frandship Challenge

2007-06-05T15:35:00.000-04:00

One of the most taxing challenges for all males searching for the hot chica on Orkut is how to approach the said sexy female without getting the "hahaha. What a Jerk. Get lost. Delete." response. The way to find the best solution is to brain storm..

And this is exactly what this fellow blogger is doing. He is spearheading the first 'Lamest Ever Orkut Challenge' in order to get the best way to get a girl to accept a man as her "frand"..

Only funny messages please. You guys should know by now that we women love phanny guys! So head over to his page and leave suggestion(s) - he is even offering a prize.

Go! Think something funny! And you can practise in the comment box - feel free to perfect it here..

Twenty Questions..

2007-06-05T10:01:00.000-04:00

No, Not philosophical ones.. and for those who already know me.. you can nitpick about the details :P
Anshul tagged me. And Bachcha knows that I do his tags religiously.. after all IIT/IIM-C combo makes it hard to refuse him :P

1.Pick out a scar you have, and explain how you got it?
On my knee. Ma says I broke a bottle over it doing a Karate move. I have no recollection of any such thing. But the scar is there - and most of my antics as a child are documented in the "Idiot will do anything as a dare" category. So it could very well be true.

2. What is on the walls in your room?
The office walls are plastered with cartoons, my posters and memorabilia. Home walls are more tastefully done ;) They have pictures of me with my family and niece all over.

3. What does your phone look like?
Razr. Need to change to something else soon.

4. What music do you listen to?
Anything and everything - oldies, classical, rock, heavy metal - you name it. It all depends on my mood.

5. What is your current desktop picture?
A group picture of the sharks .. The one not approved by someone ;)

6. What do you want more than anything right now?
A vacation back home :(

7. Do you believe in gay marriage?
I don't believe in marriage, period. But I am an equal opportunity person and so believe that everyone should be equally miserable.

8. What time were you born?
Morning with the 10.30 siren.. As my Ma puts it.. the world was warned..PS. why the heck do they have that alarm thing anyway?

9. Are your parents still together?
Much to my amazement.. yes.. still going strong.

10. What are you listening to?
A whiny question from the lab member, the jazz music from boss's office and my stomach growling.. need food, girls.. is it time yet??

11. What's something people may not know about you?
That I am an intensely private person .. no, really!

12. The last person to make you cry?
Was long time back..

13. What is your favourite perfume/cologne?
Estee Lauder's Beautiful.

14. What kind of hair/eye color do you like on the opposite sex?
I am a sucker for hazel eyes but I like eyes that sparkle with humor and intelligence. Hair- as long as it is there, the color does not matter much. Though bald is beautiful on some men..

15. Do you like pain killers?
Yes, please two with my drink ;)

16. Are you too shy to ask someone out?
Not really.

17. Favourite pizza topping?
Sausage or Barbecue Chicken with pineapple.

18. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?
Mom's cooking or some excellent scallops pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeee..

19. Who was the last person you made mad?
Probably every one I talked with yesterday morning. I was tired and not a happy camper.

20. Is anyone in love with you?
I hope not. Unless I am being kept in the dark... No secrets. you hear!!

Anyone, who wants to take this up, is welcome to..

Relatively Speaking

2007-06-04T16:01:00.001-04:00

Mom: Your senior,XYZ gave birth to twins.
Me: Oh! Great! I will mail her.
Mom: She is older, y'know. And had to get treatment. So, now she has kids - two!
Me: So you want me to wait so you will have all the grand kids in one shot?
Mom: No, You have to do things at the right time!
Me: So, let me get the number of the sperm bank.. and get this thing over with.
Mom: Ungrateful child!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Sis: So, what are you up to?
Me: Nothing.
Sis: What about your life - tell me are you seeing anyone?
Me: Biblically speaking?
Sis: You are shameless.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Grandma: Hello. Beta, are you eating?
Me: Yes, Naniji.
Grandma: You are still studying?
Me: Yes.
Grandma: How long before it is over.
Me: *mentally - hopefully never* - still few more years, naniji.
Grandma - When I was your age, I had 6 children!
Me: *Mentally - and child marriages were also mandatory then* Yes, naniji.
Grandma: You have to get married.
Me: The line is bad, I will call you later..
*Yeah, she is the only one I don't mouth off to.. you got to respect some people :P*

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Dad: I met with this young man. IIM graduate. Such a smart kid.
Me: Hmm.
Dad: He wil make someone a great husband.
Me: Hmmm.
Dad: And India is growing. GDP is up. This is where it is at.
Me: Hmmm.
Dad: So what are your future plans?
Me: Err...
Dad: You should think of your future.
Me: Hmmm.
Dad: you are impossible! All I get is er and hmmmmm from you.Now your sister - she is married and has two kids.
Me: yeah, I always said she was a sucker for stupid things.
Dad: Hahhaha. Now, beta. Think about what I said..
Me: errrrrrrrr...
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Bro: What's up?
Me: Nothing much.
Bro: So I was told to talk with you about the whole "It's time to think of.."
Me: Yada Yada Yada..
Bro: exactly. Consider I spoke. I will say ..
Me: was my usual asinine self.
Bro: Exactly. Now that is out of the way. What is the deal now? Usual.
Me: Yep. Same ole ..
Bro: One of these days, you will settle to at least live with some one.
Me: Why do you hate me so??
Bro: Well. Let me count the ways.. there was this time back in high school, when you told the girl next door that I had a crush on her.
Me: But she made all the gaa gaa eyes at you after that.. what fun!!
Bro: Yeah, it was for you. But that made her sister dump me.
Me: Well.. if you kept me in the loop, I would know you had the hots for the sister...
Bro: You would have snitched on me!
Me: Not unless you made fun of me..
Bro: You were the younger one - you are born to be made fun of.
Me: hah! So speaketh the mature one.
Bro: I was the wise one.
Me: Were not.
Bro: Was so.
Sis -in - law: Get off the god damn phone, you two year olds..
Both the siblings - Jeez.. Invasion of privacy!! You heathen folk..
------------------------------------------------------------------------
And people wonder why I make excuses to not pick my phone...

Contemplations

2007-06-02T11:08:00.000-04:00

Why is it that we miss most that which we said we really don't need?

Why is it people whom we push away are those that we need most?

Why is it that a simple voice from far away soothes us like a touch cannot?

Why do we want things we can not have?

Why do not want things we already have?

Why do we love?

Why do we love those whom we love?

Why do strangers mean more to us than friends sometimes?

Why can we not let go of fears and embrace the future?

Why does heartache scare us so?

Is loving without telling the object of our affection worse than not loving at all?

How do we tell someone that you are in love?

Why is letting someone go so difficult?

Why are break ups so messy?

Is it wrong to hurt those we love by following our heart?

Is it better to let things be?

Is it wrong to ask a friend about that thing that irked you most?

How do you tell that you are hurting?

Who do you tell that you are hurting?

Is it wrong to want transient pleasures?

It is right to hurt others to get these transient pleasure?

Is it wrong to have flexible morals?

Is it wrong to not want to be around people?

Edited in - Playing on a loop..
Jagjit singing Ek Purana Mausam Lauta..

Ek Purana Mausam

A Friday Audio on A Friday!!!

2007-06-01T09:28:00.000-04:00

Dumadum Mast Kalander sung by Runa Laila.

DAMA DAM MAST

N'joy.

Random Musings

2007-05-31T15:00:00.000-04:00

So people have noticed that I am online despite being at a conference and asked the question why am I not listening to the talks despite being a self proclaimed geek.. So let me reassure them, I am listening to the talks. I hate the auditorium built for midgets! My legs threatened to quit on me if I made them sit on those closely spaced seats again. And since I like my legs, I have moved my ass to the basement where the talks are being broad casted. Here, I can lounge on the fairly comfortable sofa and click away on my laptop.. ah! the bliss..

So now that I am connected to internet, listening to the non-coding RNAs talk, I am happy with life.. Let me tell you what I have learnt from the shameless people watching that I have done in these past two days..

The lunch tables become mini nations - especially when it comes to the Chinese, the French and the Germans. The loud mouth at the table is always the American pointing out to the French how they suck as tourists since they spend most time complaining about everything American.. To a person who has seen an American tourist this is one of the most hilarious line ever.

The newcomers at the conference are the most well dressed. I mean, these people have bought only their best clothes here. Contrast that to the HHMI investigator or the Nobel Prize winner - who is wearing about a decade old clothes that barely fit, sipping bear and talking science.

The newbies are also talking about sitting through all the sessions. They are the ones that have the glazed look in their eyes today from information overload.

Most Desi guys try to hit on every girl who sits alone at a table. And they are so clueless (I got the "You don't look that old" - when I told him I was a senior student.. and he was cute :P). Students in general need to learn how to go and talk with random people and build networks. These are the people who might review your next paper, you might end up collaborating with or might end up hating.. you would never know unless you break the ice.

There is nothing sweeter in life than having scientists you know and admire tell you that they thought your paper was kick -ass. And sit next to you at lunch/dinner and talk science.

There is also a lot of work that will be awaiting when I get back. There were at least 4 labs that are working on the same thing I am interested in :(

Life is nice when you get to hear about alternative options in life. Talked with CEO of the RNA society about career in publishing.

I like Madison. It's a pretty town - and the campus is just vibrant and alive. Though this year I plan to do nothing but lounge out near the lake avoiding both my current and future boss.

Life is good. I am going to enjoy things because things are going to be hectic after I get back ..

Friday Jamming on Thursday Morning..

2007-05-31T09:59:00.001-04:00

Howie Day singing Collide.
A track that has wormed it's way into my head today..

Howie Day - Collide

PS- While we are given a wireless account - the point is that it is A wireless account for 1500 people to share.. So I will reply to each and everyone of your comments, when I get back home.. For now, here's something to hum..

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide

A girl's got to do...

2007-05-30T11:58:00.000-04:00

Dear neighbor who lives downstairs,
Sorry for the thump.. thump ..you heard on and off again late Monday night. I know, you cussed at me – coz I heard the reciprocal thump as you hit your ceiling with Gawd knows what. But I was making very important inquiry and could not do a half ass job..

You see, the girlfriend convinced me that I needed a pretty summer dress. Well, to be fair – she really did not have to twist my arm that much, once she showed me what she had in mind. A strapless, pretty black print dress – just what a gal needs to show off her pretty lil self in summer.. So, I got the dress. What does that have to with the “thump”, you ask? Good question.. let me tell you about what a gal has to do to get into the dress like that..

Did I tell you it was a strapless number? I did? Well, you don't know me enough to ~~now~~ know that that is not my style..well, not really. So I did not have the right accessories to to wear that strapless lil thing. So had to go to VS and be traumatized at what it costs a girl to get a simple thing to hold her boobs :)

So, I finally had a matching bra – black, strapless, sexy lacy nothing.. Late Monday night, a thought struck me.. I decided that since I am going to the meeting and there is always the dance party there, why not take the dress? Just as I thought that another thought struck me – I have never, ever danced in a lil, strapless number like that! So, what if my dancing floor nightmare comes true? (I am dancing with the cutest guy on the floor and my clothes fall off. Yeah I have weird nightmares..)..Once that thought impinged on my mind, I could not let go of the worry. So I dressed up.

Put on my sexy, lacy bra. And then the dress. Then the nice shoes (yeah you got to have the right shoes!!) So far so good. But since my boobs were not strapped in and bound by umpteen connections like a regular bra – I was still worried. So bent over – just to see if they pop out. And nope they did not. Though if I ever have to do that, I will make sure no stroke patient is near by :P

Well, then I just decided to do random things – lifted my hand as drinking drink. Nope, nothing so far.. then tried doing everyday normal things one would do while meeting people – hugging, shaking hands, shaking hands vigorously (yeah, should avoid that for the bounce they give).. but then I wondered what if I am dancing? They are going to be stressed out then. So I put on some dance music and started jiving. Then the Bhangra. And then while shouting oye! oye! jumped up and down .. that was the thump you heard- heels on a wooden floor.. but it was rhythmic, na? I mean I know I cant carry a beat to save my life - but I thought it was rather sweet sounding thump :)

Twice or thrice convinced me that "the girls" were firmly held in check both by the bra and the tight dress, but dear neighbour.. I saw myself jumping in the mirror!!The picture of a grown women wearing a lil black dress and black heels and jumping up and down was to much for me – I rolled in laughter on the bed. Then had to check if it was really as funny as I thought – so did it again.. and again.. and again.. so sorry!!

Next time, you hear that noise, you can just come upstairs to see what I am checking out now.. Chances are you might be entertained rather than pissed off..

Wisconsin Bound

2007-05-28T15:40:00.000-04:00

Bloggers, commenter's and anony-mice.. lend me your ear..

I will be off to the RNA meeting at Madison, Wisconsin. Though we are assured wireless connection and plenty of beer to help us beat the demands of 9 am to 11pm sessions, I am not sure how frequently I will blog.

So here is something for you all to answer (Shameless inspiration (Anu Malik mafik) from TGFI :P)-

a. What bought you to this site?

b. What do you like about this site?

c. What more would you like to read here?

d. Suggestions for Friday audio...PS- I am without my music collection, so you might have to mail me the audio.

Party on, folks! While I try to immerse myself ~~by the pool chair, basking in sun, sipping beer, ogling boys........wait did I say that loud?~~ in science!!

PS- For all those near or at Madison, Wisconsin (and those I have not mailed yet..) - Let's meet at The Pub (inside the campus, near the lakeside??) on Saturday evening.

Sex and the Desi

2007-05-27T16:14:00.000-04:00

Recently Lalit posted a nice write up on Bollywood Euphemisms and made the comment that we are next to Chinese when it comes to making love. I am deeply offended by this. My countrymen are the best lovers. Never mind that they have reportedly a small penis or that they are the quickest in bed.. remember that size does not matter.. and doing it quickly may just result in doing it often..

Why do I think Desi men rule? (Ps - My Mom and Actin should stop reading at this point.. Ma, this is all based on hear say.. Actin - I will explain later :P)

Well for one, give the desi man the green light (usually to stop him from dry humping your leg, your sofa or your dog), he will drop his pants and strip down to his socks in micro second. I mean if there was a Olympiad on stripping, we would ace it. And when he is down to his socks and nothing else, scratching his belly with a silly grin on his face, he will look so sexy - you will get down on your knees and praise the lord..

And for all his degrees, the poor man still does not know how to unhook the damn bra.. He will seem so endearing as he flops you around like a fish to try and understand this complex, infernal device. His look of intense concentration as he tries lord knows what ways to get it off, will just make you want to take the bra off your self. That is his genius!

Another plus is that he just knows the routine down pat - I mean while other men will try to kiss your entire body and caress you - the Desi man knows where it is at - he will kiss you first - ram his tongue and give you a free tonsil checkup and then move on to your breast. First squeeze the right and then left. Use the old "find the right radio station' routine to squeeze your nipples. And then go straight down south. No playing. No suspense.

And he takes his readings of the Penthouse and the porn seriously. So he will give you badges of honor - proud love bites that you can show off to the girls tomorrow.

And the sex talk! It is like a primer to the porn vids.. he wants to say it all and he usually does. Sometimes the context is even right!

Also most Desi men are not afraid to tell you or rather direct you to what they want. So the desi man will surely and eagerly just try pointing your mouth south, till you are staring at the one eyed monster.. . Forgive the kink in your neck.. he was so trying to tell you what he needs..

And he knows the importance of finding the clitoris.. He will try hard. I mean, even if you give him map and mark the spot with a big X, he still will love to dig down there. And his enthusiasm should be taken into account when you wince while walking the next day. Only a desi man will take the girl saying, gently baby, while wincing to mean that she is into it.. And he will try to find the elusive g-spot with the same confidence that Columbus went about sailing for new lands.... and if you were reluctant to get your panties out of the way, the wedgies you get are your fault.. Not his. The poor man has a so many positions and techniques that he wants to get to..But he is diligent man. And he will ask you if you came every three minutes. Not until you have told him that he is the best and you came 5 times in the past half hour will he stop fiddling and move on.

And then there is the whole sledgehammer routine.. I mean who would not find that sexy - the constant ramming and slamming into your hip bones.. Once there, the desi man is not going to waste your time or cut into your sleep.. he is so going to finish up before you blink. And you really should up the calcium pills - this man requires a strong woman..

He is also a polite man. He will thank you for letting him do the nasty to you. His momma has raised a gentleman you see ..

Pps - For my prudish readers.. I am sorry you went through the whole post :)

The pointers

2007-05-27T10:51:00.000-04:00

Tips to being a good Desi in Amerika

Talk loudly. No matter where you are. No matter who else you might disturb.

Take your kids out to eat and let them run amok in a restaurant - disturbing all. And never discipline them.

Know that if you pay for a meal you are entitled to be rude to the server. Or the manager.

Know that if you have paid for the movie ticket, you can talk on your cell phone, make cat calls at the heroine or shout random stuff that only your friend gets.

Be late for meetings. Even the ones you have arranged. Because only your time is valuable - screw the rest of the world.

Drink but only secretively. Date but don't tell anyone. Wear short skirts in the privacy of your home but be sure to remark on others who do so openly.

Talk only in your mother tongue. Fuck the rest who can not understand. I mean it's their problem.. not yours.

Always make sure you know the name/caste/ origin of random Desi you meet. If the said Desi does not comply with the request, call her "Americanized". I mean the whole point of being an Indian is to love the fact that you belong to a particular "state" and "caste"!

Never go out of your way to make friends with any one from another country! Actually avoid them foreigners when you can. The cursed folks never can match your rich vibrant history, culture and what not..

If you end up making American friends - avoid all Desis! They are the heathens!

Make a big deal about your country's great ways, rip apart the whole "American way" and then apply for a citizenship here - coz that way your child has a future!

Fell free to counter or endorse the statements.

Friday Audio

2007-05-25T08:27:00.001-04:00

Han - There is ABC game going on.
Me- So?
Han- You are totally worthless. It is the best game - rivalry.. blah blah blah.
Me- So? I don't give a damn.
Han- Pick a team. Bet laga.
Me- I don't follow the games.
Han- Pick a team. Winner picks the next post..

Such have been the conversation with the resident sports-oholic.
Sometimes I win. This time I lost. Here's his Friday Audio request (original one was for Himesh's wonderful surrrrrrrr..)

Nickelback singing If everyone cared...

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died

nickelback - if ev...

N'joy...

Friday Audio

2007-05-24T13:23:00.000-04:00

I had promised Ghalib. Sometime back, I had blogged about my favorite ghazals and the top of the list was this track (followed closely by Aah ko chahiye) - Hazaron Khwahishen Aisi sung by Jagjit Singh. So when the request came in for this song.. I could not refuse. I promise to follow it up with songs other than ghazals :)

Hazaron_Khwahishen...

Here are the lyrics-
Hazaaron khwahishain aisi ke har khwahish pe dam nikle
bohot nikle mere armaan lekin fir bhi kam nikle

nikalna khuld se aadam ka sunte aayain hain lekin
bohot be-aabru hokar tere kooche se ham nikle

mohabbat mein naheen hai farq jeene aur marne kaa
usee ko dekh kar jeete haiN jis kaafir pe dam nikle

Khuda ke waaste parda na kaabe se uthaa zaalim
kaheeN aisa na ho yaan bhee wohi kaafir sanam nikle

kahaaN maiKHaane ka darwaaza ‘Ghalib’ aur kahaan waaiz
par itana jaante hain kal wo jaata tha ke ham nikle

------------------------------------------------------
Couplets not included in this

Dare kyoon mera qaatil kya rahega uskee gardan par
wo khooN, jo chashm-e-tar se 'umr bhar yoon dam-ba-dam nikle

bharam khul jaaye zaalim tere qaamat ki daraazee ka
agar is turra-e-pur pech-o-KHam ka pech-o-kham nikle

magar likhwaaye koi usko khat, to hamse likhawaaye
huee subah aur ghar se kaan par rakhkar qalam nikle

huee is daur mein mansoob mujhse baada aashaamee
fir aaya wo zamaana, jo jahaaN se jaam-e-jam nikle

huee jinse tavaqqo khastagee kee daad paane kee
wo hamse bhee ziyaada khasta-e-tegh-e-sitam nikle

zara kar jor seene par ki teer-e-pursitam nikle
jo wo nikle to dil nikle, jo dil nikle to dam nikle

We have been betrayed!

2007-05-24T08:44:00.000-04:00

Keith Olbermann yesterday had a special comment on the wimpy Dems who caved in to the Prez again, disregarding the one thing the people wanted them to do after coming into power- stop the war!

On the Democratic leadership -

You, the men and women elected with the simplest of directions—Stop The War—have traded your strength, your bargaining position, and the uniform support of those who elected you… for a handful of magic beans.
You may trot out every political cliché from the soft-soap, inside-the-beltway dictionary of boilerplate sound bites, about how this is the “beginning of the end” of Mr. Bush’s “carte blanche” in Iraq, about how this is a “first step.”
Well, Senator Reid, the only end at its beginning... is our collective hope that you and your colleagues would do what is right, what is essential, what you were each elected and re-elected to do.
Because this “first step”… is a step right off a cliff.

And on the President,

And this President!
How shameful it would be to watch an adult... hold his breath, and threaten to continue to do so, until he turned blue.
But how horrifying it is… to watch a President hold his breath and threaten to continue to do so, until innocent and patriotic Americans in harm’s way, are bled white.
You lead this country, sir?
You claim to defend it?
And yet when faced with the prospect of someone calling you on your stubbornness—your stubbornness which has cost 3,431 Americans their lives and thousands more their limbs—you, Mr. Bush, imply that if the Democrats don’t give you the money and give it to you entirely on your terms, the troops in Iraq will be stranded, or forced to serve longer, or have to throw bullets at the enemy with their bare hands.
How transcendentally, how historically, pathetic.
Any other president from any other moment in the panorama of our history would have, at the outset of this tawdry game of political chicken, declared that no matter what the other political side did, he would insure personally—first, last and always—that the troops would not suffer.
A President, Mr. Bush, uses the carte blanche he has already, not to manipulate an overlap of arriving and departing Brigades into a ‘second surge,’ but to say in unequivocal terms that if it takes every last dime of the monies already allocated, if it takes reneging on government contracts with Halliburton, he will make sure the troops are safe—even if the only safety to be found, is in getting them the hell out of there.
Well, any true President would have done that, Sir.
You instead, used our troops as political pawns, then blamed the Democrats when you did so.

Here's the video. A must listen!

And read the entire transcript here.

A plug

2007-05-23T19:45:00.000-04:00

I am fascinated by genes. That should not surprise any of you regulars here. To me any biological process is made so much more fascinating when you try to understand what is happening at the molecular level.
Take pregnancy for instance! A happy product of a love between a faithful couple!

Not true. If you look at what our genes say. An introduction to imprinting and Haig theory. Simply put go check out if our genes scream that we are not a monogamous species :)

MasterCard Moment

2007-05-23T10:46:00.000-04:00

After countless hours spent in the lab generating hundreds of strains, it still tickles me pink when my boss tells me - Well Done!

It was part of experiments done last year. But I proved a point today by showing him the old data. We sat, side by side ( after ages), staring at the computer screen with me pulling up images to support or aid our hypothesis. An hour later, he looked at me and said that I continue to amaze him with the amount of data generated! And that he would be sorry to let me go...

And that makes my day :)

Demand here

2007-05-22T15:30:00.000-04:00

Accepting request for Friday audio.
Ghalib preferred. Others will be considered..

Ps. Thanks for all the wishes,suggestions and what not..

Unwind!

2007-05-22T08:38:00.000-04:00

After the umpteenth night spent tossing and waking up after a particularly bad nightmare, I decided to head to the doctor's. The clinic is a place that gives me the heebie-jeebies. I am not a hypochondriac but being so close to so many sick people makes me wanna go home and bathe in disinfectant. So I waited there in one corner trying to avoid the really sick people. Try standing in a corner propped to a wall you have just wiped with Kleenex and keeping the kid with the runny nose from touching you.. you will be close to achieving my acute frustration at being kept waiting.

Finally, I got to go and meet Dr.M. She has attended me for my allergies before. She asked me what was going on - I patiently listed my symptoms - No sleep, fatigued, Allergies hitting me left, right and centre (I am now allergic to things like water :P) and waking up in cold sweat and chewing insides of my cheek.. She took one look at me and asked if I was close to graduation. And I said yes.

She told me that I am suffering from acute stress (Duh! I knew that going in ..) . My increased allergies are a symptom of a compromised immune system and if I keep this up I am heading for serious trouble. I needed to unwind. Take it easy. Talk to someone. Cut down on coffee and alcohol. No junk food. Exercise and this is the biggie - bed by 11 pm!! She has told me not to internalize my fears or suppress my frustration, but work them out by talking with a friend or a therapist. The one thing that I can not do is talk about things that bother me until I have worked them out :)

So I am going to cut down on things I can control, relax every weekend doing things I like. Talk with a friends who cheer me up with just their hello.. And try not to think of things that are out of my control.. The only problem with this situation is that I don't know how to relax! For the past 5 years, I have worked an average of 80-100 hours week. And when I was home I was reading papers or studying. I realize that my life is slowly turning into a life of a potential stroke patient and I need to calm down and de-stress..
Any suggestions?

Playing today...

Badi suni suni hai...

Barbs across the wire

2007-05-21T10:51:00.000-04:00

Me: Hello..
He: You are so depressing! Why do you write such gloomy posts?
Me: Why are you calling at effin 3 in the morning?
He: I just got off work, I am bored.
Me: F U! .. bangs phone down.

Me: Morning!
He: It's 6 in the morning! WTF?
Me: Payback is a bitch!
He: She sure sounds like you.. bangs phone down!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
He: Hey!Why did you not pick the phone up?
Me: Coz I was busy?
He: Contemplating on which shoe to wear?
Me: Go to hell!

Me: Why are you online?
He: Kinda slow today..
Me: Killed most of NY? Nothing left?
He: F U.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
He: Where were you? Been ringing you for past hour!
Me: I was running in the park!
He: You call that running? I think it is like a duck waddling!
Me: So says a person whose idea of exercise is changing channels..
He: I am a Greek god.. exercise is for mere mortals.
Me: Hah!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
He: I am bored. Entertain me.
Me: Sure. Try adding two and two together.. you will come up with something new each time!
He: hahaha! Very funny.

Me: Check the new post. (yes, I shamelessly bug friends into reading it)
He: Already read my share of trash.
Me: What? Already done with Playboy?
He: That is a work of art!
Me: Yeah, forgot you like pictures ;)
He: Shut up! Go read the boring poetry book...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
He: What are you doing?
Me: Watching Grey's Anatomy.
He: That trash? Nothing like that happens in a hospital!
Me: Just coz you don't get laid...
He: So speaketh you?? Who spends 99.99% in the boring lab?
Me: Shh... McDreamy is on the screen .. I cannot hear you.
He: That is making me throw up..I will call you after my stomach settles down.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Me: Hey. What's up?
He: You are too cheerful. What did you do? Kill some innocent spirit?
Me: Nope! Better..
He: What?
Me: Wrote about you..
He: Now at least people will enjoy your blog.
Me: Yeah! they will love me more for putting up with you..
He: Ask them!

What say you guys? Don't I deserve a standing ovation for putting up with such people??

Monday Humor

2007-05-21T09:54:00.000-04:00

Lalit has put up a hilarious post on Bollywood Euphemisms.

In order to show objectionable, traumatizing and offending acts on screen,
without having a lawsuit slapped on your face by the jobless moral guardians
of the society, many age old methods have been employed by the champions of
Bollywood. As you would have observed dear readers, more often than not, these
euphemisms are relating to sex. Now this brings a Q to mind - Is depicting sex on screen such a hard task, that our filmmakers had to resort to such tactics?

Go check it out! Made my Monday:)

If I could lie

2007-05-20T14:00:00.000-04:00

This is prompted by a conversation I had with a friend today. If I could lie, I would have told him -

Things get better.

The pain fades.

The emptiness goes away.

Life is the same afterwards.

There are days when you will not even think of the past.

Hope springs eternal.

The cynicism fades.

But I can not. And I wonder for the nth time, How does one proceed to heal? How does one learn to forget? How does one let the fear go? How does one live?

Favorite Literary Heroes

2007-05-18T14:19:00.000-04:00

This started in the comment section at Neihal's blog while discussing Ayn Rand. She asked me to write about my favorite male characters (from books) and how could I refuse?

Here's my list of top ten literary characters (aka men I drooled over/ lusted/ admired*)-

Howard Roark from "The Fountainhead" - I fell in love with this character when I read the book when I was sixteen. Even today, Roarke appeals to me as few characters have. He has something I admire - a strong belief in himself, his talent and the knowledge that as long as he does what he is good at, it does not matter what the critics say.

Fitzwilliam Darcy from "Pride and Prejudice" - He is the aloof, arrogant guy but goes above and beyond for people he loves. What I like about him is his caustic wit :)

Edmond Dantès from "Count of Monte Cristo" - An old favorite. I like the fact that he dishes out to get even .. my kinda guy :P

Rhett Butler from "Gone with the Wind" - "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!" Won both Scarlett and me over :) I like his character - he knows how to manipulate the situation to get the woman he loves, knows she lusts after another, does everything in his power to change that and then knows when to walk away!

Atticus Finch from "To Kill A Mockingbird" - He is honest, moral and willing to stand up for a good cause.

Holden Caulfield from the "Catcher in the Rye" - Okay! I know he is just sixteen in the novel! But he is the ideal angry young man... he hates hypocrisy and is a born cynic. He uses profanities and is cynical and does not trust his fellow men.. yeah, I like him alright, have since I first read the book when I was about twelve ..

Ari Ben Cannan from the "Exodus" - One of the few books that I carry. I adore Ari's character. Born in a kibbutz, an army commander, ruthless and driven. And does not know how to show emotions. Yeah, I know.. I read it in my "I love Israel" phase ..

Heathcliff from the "Wuthering Heights" - Passionate, brooding and intense. What teenage girl did not love this character? It happens to still be my favorite novel.

Michael Corleone from "The Godfather" - I read the book way before I saw the movie. In fact, it happens to be the first book my Dad bought for me - rather the first grown up novel. I like Michael - he is seemingly a soft spoken man but has a hard core, intelligent and a planner. The Don.. and yes, I loved the character more after I saw Al Pacino in the movie.

Santiago from "The Alchemist" - A man who follows his dream. A book I quote most often :)

Ps. Neihal, I left Legolas for you :P

* Edited after BaL kept dropping a whole list of excellent cartoon characters in the comment box - All of which I adore :)

Reaffirming My Allegiance

2007-05-17T14:06:00.000-04:00

Koi Yeh Kaise Bata...

Convinced??

Friday Audio

2007-05-17T12:41:00.000-04:00

It's been a crazy week- computer problems, understaffed Server maintenance staff and of course conference deadlines :)
It's amazing how all things that can go wrong, go wrong when you least want them to go wrong. So here's something to soothe the soul.

This is BongoP'o'ndit 's request. He will be in beautiful Aussie land when he gets to hear this.
The song is "Yeh Mera Deewanapan hai" sung by Susheela Raman.
Movie: The Namesake.

Susheela Raman _Ye...

For the purists, here's the original song sung by Mukesh from the film Yahudi.
The movie is a Hindi remake of the classic "Wuthering Heights", Emily Brontë's only novel.

Yeh_Mera_Deewana_P...

For those who like Susheela Raman's voice, she really sounds better in English. Here's the song "Same Song", also from the movie 'The Namesake'

Susheela Raman - S...

Edited in - Seems like a lot of people had problems with the previous MP3 player. So promise to load things only on esnips from now on! Sorry for the inconvinience!

Kiss Meme - Update

2007-05-16T12:15:00.000-04:00

Whoever said Happiness is like a kiss...you must share it to enjoy it was right!

Much joy awaits in these places -

Lalit's passionate saga.

Once he drew
With one long kiss my whole soul thro'
My lips, as sunlight drinketh dew.
~Alfred Lord Tennyson

Himanshu's quest

"May I print a kiss on your lips?" I said,
And she nodded her full permission:
So we went to press and I rather guess
We printed a full edition.
~Joseph Lilientha

Sonya's regurgitation.

Her kisses left something to be desired...

Justso's innocent dilemma

I never thought that love could feel like this - then you changed my world with just one kiss. ..N'sync :P

Anshul's ongoing quest..

A kiss is something you cannot give without taking and cannot take without giving.~ Anonymous

Deepti's discovery. If you have never checked this girl's paintings, go now! Just beautiful :)

The moment eternal - just that and no more -
When ecstasy's utmost we clutch at the core
While cheeks burn, arms open, eyes shut, and lips meet!
~ Robert Browning

Ps.. If any one else has done this tag, apart from the Lord himself , drop a line in the comment box. For those of you who don't have a blog, please free to talk about it in the comment section.

I am going to be busy with the conference preparation, so I will be back to post the Friday Audio only.
N' joy!